Page 99 of Kai
“On the night the ocean swallowed me whole.”
Kai cocked his straight eyebrows. “What happened?”
“I don’t talk about it.” I glanced away. “You’ll think I’m a coward.”
“Never.” With a gentle touch, he turned my face toward him. “Do you think I’m a coward?”
“You’re very brave all the time, including today.”
“So are you.”
“I don’t know if I can say it aloud.”
“I did it, and I think it helped.” He squeezed my hand again. “Try it.”
“It was my mistake,” I finally said. “I jumped.”
Chapter Thirty-one
Cece
There. I’d acknowledged the biggest failure of my life. To another person. To Kai. Instead of reacting strongly or jumping to conclusions, he leveled a steady gaze at me.
“So, the ocean swallowed you,” he pointed out quietly. “But only because you allowed it to do so. It was never about the ocean. This has always been about a decision you made but couldn’t accept until now?”
Is that what I’d done?Oh, shit. That’s exactly what I’d done.
“I hate it when you call me out,” I bit out, and yet this wasn’t true. I admired someone who wasn’t willing to accept the lies I told myself. “I’ve never told this to anyone before.”
“Not even your sisters?” he asked, studying my face.
“Especially not them.”
“But you are all so close.” His forehead furrowed. “Why not tell them?”
“Because I didn’t want them to discover how weak I am,” I confessed. “I especially didn’t want them to think I was nuts.”
“Cece, you are not—”
“I jumped from one of my father’s yachts.” I lifted a hand in the air and forced myself to continue. “We were at the French Riviera, of all places. Most people would love to go there, but I hated being trapped on a ship full of turds.”
He furrowed his brow.“A ship full of turds?”
“Father had invited a bunch of young guns to ‘woo’ us. They were all greedy and stupid, gold diggers for sure. Trapped inside a luxury yacht, my sisters and I were under siege. I know,first-world problems, poor little rich girl—”
“Don’t do that,” he ordered.
“Do what?”
“Make light of your trauma, diminish the impact of your emotional scars.”
Was that what I was doing?
“Perhaps you’ve never experienced hunger, war, poverty, or disease, but you lost your mom and your father was a dick. Your self-esteem took a hit. You also lost your brother and your family. All that anger you carry around like a shield? You can’t ignore it forever.”
“Yeah.” I went for sarcasm. “These days I’m angry at my anger. But Mauna Loa is erupting at the moment. We don’t need another volcanic explosion in the area.”
Kai smiled at my attempt at a joke. “Little steps,” he said. “Back to the yacht story?”
