“If I said no?…?would you care?”
“No.” I smirk at the word, unable to recognize myself.
Never in my life have I wanted to force anyone into sex. The thought hasn’t even crossed my mind, and Noah?…?Noah is a virgin, for fuck’s sake; his first time should be the best I can give him, but somehow, I suppose I’m still angry with him. He kidnapped me and held me prisoner; it’s only my right that I’m rough with him, and he seems to agree. Not to mention our conversation in the bath—that promise he can’t give me?…?Fuck him for that. He deserves this.
I pull my fingers out and coat my cock with lube. I hesitate for a moment, watching his trembling body splayed out for me, wondering if he’s truly ready for this, but then he rocks back toward me, and the strained words pushing past his lips make my mouth water.
“Please take me, Ash. I can’t stand not being connected to you.”
I hiss another curse under my breath as I grip my cock and lead myself into his body. Despite how I stretched him, he’s still so fucking tight, and I gasp at every inch sinking inside. My balls tighten, and I feel like I’m going to come if I don’t slow down.
Noah glances at me over his shoulder. “Are you okay?”
“I just, uh?…?need a minute.” I lean over his back, trying to stop myself from being consumed by the pleasure. I have to take command over this situation—convince myself I’m the one on top and in control. “Legs spread,” I mumble, tapping his thighs, and he willingly parts them wider as I sink deeper inside.
He looks back at me over his shoulder, eyes dark and half-lidded. “Carve me out, Ash. Inch by inch.”
His dirty talk is weird as fuck, but the way he says it turns me on. That breathy rasp of a whisper, as if he’s telling me a secret the world isn’t worthy of hearing. It’s only between us.
Our truths.
Our secrets.
Us.
“How does it feel?” I stroke the small of his back, feeling him tremble. “Your first time?”
“G-Good,” he chokes out. “Feels good.”
“You’re doing so well, taking me like this. Letting me fuck you.”
“I’d let you—ah—I’d let you do anything to me, Asher.”
“Really? Would you let me do this?” I grab a handful of his hair and rip his head back hard.
He moans at that, offering no resistance. “Yeah.”
“Would you let me do this?” I grip his throat next, squeezing hard and punishingly.
“Y-Yeah. Anything.”
“As long as I have my hands on you and my cock in you, you don’t care if it hurts, right? You like it. You like my attention on you, even if it hurts.”
“Y-Yeah,” Noah moans, breath cut off from my ruthless grip on his throat. “Please, Ash.”
This isn’t the way it normally goes, I know that. When doing stuff like this, you’re supposed to have a safe word, a gesture, something that tells the other party when you’ve truly had enough, when it’s not fun anymore, when you’re overriding boundaries. I think Noahwantsme to override his boundaries though. He wants me to find where that line goes, where he’s truly had enough, where he transcends from a pleasurable ache to real, biting pain.
It’s not healthy, not by a long shot, but Noah isn’t someone who cares about being healthy, and neither am I. We have each other—that’s all we’ve got—and we have this safe haven where we can subject each other to what pleasures and pains our bodies crave, and what’s so wrong with that?
I’m staying with him, so I should be able to do whatever I want with him. He owes me. He fucking owes me.
I flip him around, and he lands on his back with a huff. My cock slips out of him, and I stick it inside once more. He stares at me as if I punched a hole in him, a low, keening noise tearing from his throat, but when I glance down between our bodies, his cock is hard and dripping precum onto his stomach.
“I’m going to come, okay?” I grunt, fucking him so hard the bed is creaking. “And you’re going to come when I do.”
“But?…”
I grasp his jaw. “No buts. When you see me come, you’ll follow. You won’t be able to help yourself.”