Page 60 of If the Stars Align
“Oh my god, same. I read he has a girlfriend from back home, but I betthatwon’t last long…”
My stomach churns. I feel sick. I leave the shop without ordering.
When I get back to my apartment, I watch Dex’s show for the first time. I have every episode recorded, but I’ve been too nervous to watch them before now. Too afraid they’ll confirm what I already know is true. That Dex really is a star…
And it’s only a matter of time before I lose him.
Ten minutes into the first episode, my heart sinks. Somehow he’s even better than I expected. He stands out. And it’s not only because he’s shirtless half the time, which is so strange for me to see.Myboyfriend’s body on TV. The same abs and pecs I’ve brushed with my fingertips a million times, the neck I’ve bitten, the lips I’ve kissed—oh god. I turn off the show before I have to watch him kiss the hot blonde who’s making eyes at him.
How will I ever get through this?
The only solution I can come up with right now is to pour myself into law school. I meet Jeremy at the library most nights. He’s so smart, I doubt he even needs to be there, but he says he enjoys studying with me because I keep him disciplined. Apparently, if it weren’t for me, he’d be out at the bars a lotmore often, and then he’d start slacking off in school, which is what happened to him in college.
But the truth is, I like studying with him too. It’s like having my own private tutor. People should be fighting to get him into their study groups, but Jeremy jokes that I’m the only person in our class who can put up with him.
I’ll admit he’s a troublemaker. Whenever he raises his hand to speak in class, students roll their eyes with a wry smile because they know what’s coming. He’s loud, argumentative and—infuriatingly—always right. He loves to start debates, play devil’s advocate. Stir the pot. I don’t think I’m exaggerating when I say that a fair number of our classmates truly despise him.
If law schools have bad boys, Jeremy is ours. Once, he got another student so riled up in class that our professor threw his hands up in defeat and dismissed us early. We also think he made a teacher’s assistant cry one time—although she claimed her watery eyes were due to allergies.
Yes, Jeremy’s an instigator. But it isn’t just for show. He’s so smart, you actually want to hear what he has to say and, by the end, you almost invariably agree. He finds every loophole. He makes us all better law students, I think. That’s why I study with him. If I’m going to do this law school thing, I want to do it right. And Jeremy and I make a good team. He helps me tighten up my legal arguments, making sure no stone is left unturned. And I help him organize his writing, which is as untamed as he is.
Before I know it, my first semester’s over. I won’t get my grades back until after winter break, much to my mom’s dismay.But I don’t have the energy to worry about her becauseDex is in town. We spend the holidays in Beachwood. For the first time in years, our families celebrate together at his house. And this time, Luis, Lily, and Elena join the party.
It’s a perfect evening. While we’re at the table enjoying Mrs. Dexter’s feast, Dex barely stops kissing me. A peck on the cheek, one on the hand, one on my ear. Several on my lips. My mom is seated on the other side of me, so we’re safe from her glaring disapproval. Anyway, she’s busy talking to Lily, who’s in the first year of her neurosurgery residency. They’re discussing surgical techniques, like two peas in a pod. After dinner, when everyone’s distracted by football, Dex and I sneak upstairs to his bedroom and he hasmefor dessert. For a moment at least, everything is exactly as it was over the summer—with the exception of the photographers hanging out on Dex’s front lawn.
One week later, our families toast the New Year with a catered meal at my mom’s. As I sip my champagne with my boyfriend’s arm draped around me, I can’t help but reflect on everything that’s changed in the past year.
I was with Asher last winter. Now I’m with Dex.
I started law school. He’s becoming famous…
Nerves flutter in my stomach as I wonder what 2003 will bring.
Back at school in January, I get my first-semester grades. I’m stunned. I got As in all my classes. Studying with Jeremy definitely paid off. For the first time since I started law school,I feel like I belong here. I raise my hand a lot more in class. I feel calm and prepared walking into exams. I do so well that, before the end of the school year, I’m offered a coveted spot as a summer associate at one of the best firms in Chicago.
Law school summers are when the firms wine and dine you, and give you a nice big paycheck in hopes that you’ll sell them your soul after graduation. I’m not convinced I want to work for a big firm, but Jeremy, who’s at the top of the class with me, thinks it’s too good an opportunity to pass up. He’ll be working in Chicago this summer too, at a different but equally prestigious firm. “Just give it a try,” he says. “See how you like it.”
Well, I do like it. Maybe because, for the first time in my budding career, I’m getting a taste of how it feels to be a VIP, like Dex. I don’t pay for a thing the entire summer.Everythingis on the firm. We eat dinner at all the new hot spots, enjoy drinks at the swankiest bars. We get premium seating at every sporting event—luxury suites and skyboxes wherever we go. I’m seduced by it all. And it’s not just the recreation I find so exciting. The attorneys I work with are litigators, and they’re cool, confident and fast on their feet. They’re actors, essentially. It’s thrilling.
Speaking of actors…Dex’s career is really taking off. He’s a soap opera “fan favorite,” so they give him a bigger and better story line—an evil twin, of course—which means double the screentime and an opportunity for him to really show off his talent. He plays the brothers so distinctly, so convincingly, that they truly seem like two different people.
Between filming, and photoshoots, and interviews, Dex’s free time is limited. He flies me out to LA a couple of times. He trieshis best to make plans for us to see each other.
But he cancels on me. A lot.
I can tell it’s the last thing he wants to do, so I try my best to hide my disappointment. After all, what did I expect? I always knew this would happen.
I just didn’t think it would happen so fast.
My second year of law school was pretty much a carbon copy of the first. I studied hard with Jeremy. I saw Dex whenever our schedules aligned. It definitely wasn’t as often as we would have liked. He was supposed to spend the weekend with me in Bloomington after my finals, but he got stuck on thePassionsset because his co-star’s costume disappeared. By the time it was found and they finished filming, he’d missed his flight. Now I’m back in Chicago, working as a summer associate for the same firm as last year, and I have no idea when I’ll see him.
Big things are happening for Dex. He’s still taking the soap opera world by storm, but it seems like every channel I flip to, there he is guest-starring on a hit TV show. On sitcoms, where he plays the hot pizza delivery guy, or the hot fitness instructor, or the hot guy next door. On police dramas, where he’s an unwitting victim, or a witness—or the incredible season finale ofLaw & Orderthat just aired, where it turns out he wasthekiller! I never saw it coming. Jeremy watched it with me. He’s working in Chicago this summer again too. He said Dex was “pretty good,” which is about as effusive as Jeremy gets.
But during the closing credits, Mia called,shrieking, to tell me what an amazing actor my boyfriend is. Jeremy could hear her through the phone. I love how excited she is about his acting career. I think it’s brought us a little closer again. I feel awful I didn’t go to her wedding, though. It was the weekend before my second semester final exams. Mia said she understood, and I’m grateful. If I’d really wanted to, I probably could have planned to get my studying done ahead of time. I considered it. But Dex wasn’t able to go with me because of his work schedule, and I know I wouldn’t have had fun at that wedding without him. As much as I hate to admit it, Mia and Evan’s relationship is still too triggering.
The first two weeks of my summer in Chicago are so packed with law firm social events that I hardly have time to run errands. Finally, on a quiet Sunday morning, I drive to the grocery store with a long shopping list. I’m standing in the checkout line, minding my own business, when I see a picture of Dex on the cover of a tabloid magazine.
I flip through to find the article, and there are pictures of him at lunch with one of his soap opera co-stars. The sexy blonde he has the love scenes with. The scenes I can’t watch. My chest tightens as I examine each photograph. Dex is sitting at a table, wearing a baseball cap, t-shirt, and shorts, none of which I’ve ever seen him in before. But the caption makes sure to mention that his shirt is Christian Dior—and the retail cost is doublemy monthly rent in Bloomington. His co-star is seated across from him in very large sunglasses and a very small dress. Also expensive. They’re leaning toward each other. There’s one photo where Dex has his hand on hers. The headline reads “Dex & Tess: Real-Life Lovers.” My hands shake as I hold the pages.
