Jeremy grabs a fry for himself. “You wanna know why you’re not over Mr. Hollywood yet?”
I cross my arms over my chest and try not to roll my eyes again. “Sure. Enlighten me.”
He finishes chewing. “It’s because you haven’t slept with anyone since him. You’ll go on, like, two dates with a guy—maybelet him feel you up—then when he asks you for another date, you say you’re busy with work, and he never hears from you again.”
Suddenly, I’m sweating. I shrug off my wool coat and drain the dregs of my vodka soda. “I definitely need more liquor if we’re having this conversation,” I say, mostly to myself. I call over our waitress and ask for another.
“Make it two,” says Jeremy.
“At least I’m putting myself out there,” I tell him. “I’ve been on tons of dates since I moved to Chicago. It’s not my fault there’s never any chemistry.”
“There’s never any chemistry because you’re meeting men online. You know what kind of men sign up for online dating? Men who have no game.”
The waitress arrives with our drinks.
“Oh, thank god,” I say and immediately swallow a third of mine.
“Sunny, you don’t need to work that hard to get laid. Just findan attractive guy at a bar, go up and introduce yourself, and that’s it. Your dry spell will be over before you know it.”
I set my glass down on the table a bit more forcefully than I intended to. “Okay. If we’re really going to talk about my sex life right now, then I should probably set the record straight. My dry spell is over…I slept with Sebastian last week.”
Jeremy squints at me. “Who the fuck is Sebastian?”
I give an exasperated sigh. “That guy I met in the elevator at work, remember? Like, a month ago?”
“Oh yeah. The finance guy. He asked you out for drinks.” Jeremy finishes his beer and starts sipping his vodka soda.
I nod. “We went out a few times, and he was nice. Good-looking…seemed to have his shit together. So I figured, why not?”
“And?”
“It was…hmm, how do I describe it? I want to make sure I do it justice.” I pause to gulp down more of my drink. “Mediocre. That’s it. It was mediocre.”
Jeremy laughs hard at this—I knew he would. He’s wiping tears from his eyes. “That bad, huh?” he says when he recovers.
“It was the worst sex of my life.” I finish what’s left of my drink and take a sip of Jeremy’s. I look around to make sure Finance Guy’s not here, then lower my voice to a whisper. “He couldn’t…stay hard, you know? And he kept apologizing, and blaming it on the condom, but then he tried going down on me, andthatwas…” I shudder. “He had no idea what he was doing. Eventually I just told him to stop.”
“Man. I’m sorry.” Jeremy drags a hand down his chin. “I guess you have no choice but to get back on the horse and try again.”He stifles a laugh.
I ignore his pun and shake my head. “Absolutely not. This was a major setback for me. I waited over a year after my breakup to sleep with someone. And my first time back in thesaddle”—Jeremy winks at me, pleased that I acknowledged his joke—“was awful. Do you know how depressing that is?” I sigh. “I don’t think I’ll ever connect with anyone the way I connected with Dex.”
“You had intense feelings for him, Sunny. That’s why the sex was so good. But one day, you’ll have intense feelings for someone else.” Jeremy runs a hand through his hair. “Dex isn’t the be-all end-all. You’ll find someone whose life is more compatible with yours, and you’ll get your happily ever after. Like those sappy romance novels you love to read.”
I crack a smile. “They’re not sappy.”
“Yes, they are.”
“How wouldyouknow?” I ask, taking another sip of his drink.
He leans back in his booth. “I picked one up at the library the other day.”
My jaw drops. “You’re kidding, right?”
He shrugs. “I was curious.”
“Which one did you get?” I ask, propping my elbows on the table and leaning toward him.
“I don’t know, Sunny. Some…beach romance about two friends who end up fucking one summer, then their lives change forever.”