Page 79 of This Kind of Forever
I cup her face, and my right thumb smooths over her cheekbone. “I adore you, Hallie Foster, and I meant it when I said I want you. I’vebeenwanting you, for as long as I care to remember.”
Her fingers curl into my shirt, grappling for something to hold on to. “You want me…for sex?”
I frown in confusion. “No, baby, I wantyou. For so much more than just sex. I want it all.” She shakes her head, disbelieving, so I continue. “I dreamed about this when we were younger. Getting to hold you like this.”
She closes her eyes, leaning into my touch. “You did?” Her words are a mere whisper.
“I did. But you, the real you, is more than I could’ve ever hoped for.”
Her eyes open with startling clarity. “I dreamed about you, too.”
Then why did you run?
She explained some when she apologized the other day, but I still don’t understand where those impulses came from. Why my feelings scared her so much. I don’t let myself ask, though. This thing between us is fragile, and I fear that bringing up the past will put our future in jeopardy. So for now, I swallow my curiosity.
“What do you say?” My eyes trace her face, drinking her in. “Will you give us a shot? A real shot.”
Hallie smiles softly. “I think I can manage that.”
I grin. My hand slides into her hair, and the other settles on her waist, pulling her closer. I haven’t even had breakfast yet and this is already the second best day of my life, following close behind Abbie’s birth.
Some small part of me warns to be cautious. She already left me once before. I brush it off. I’m not going to let that fear take root. Not when I have Hallie here, in my house, in my arms,wanting to be with me. This is how I wanted that day on the beach to turn out.
Hallie peers up at me. “Can we…maybe not tell anyone?” she asks. My heart sinks, and my smile falls. “Not for long! I just… This is a lot, Gabe, and everything feels so complicated right now. You know I love your family like they’re my own, but…”
I swallow back my disappointment. “They can be a bit invasive.”
Her eyes plead with me to understand. “I know it’s not fair to ask, and I’m sorry. I just need a little time.”
A little time. I would find a way to give Hallie the whole world if she wanted it, so a little time is pretty tame in comparison. I can do that. If it was solely up to me, I wouldn’t want to keep this from anyone, but Hallie has her reasons.
“I’ll give you time,” I say. “To get used to this. Used tous. But if you think I’m going anywhere, you’re mistaken.”
Her hands tighten in my shirt again. “Promise?”
“Cross my heart.”
The first touch of her lips is gentle. Then she pushes onto her tiptoes, wrapping her arms around my neck, and leans in. I let her take the lead this time. Even in this, she’s a little shy, but she’ll get used to it.
I turn her around and start walking her backwards. When her back meets the island, my hands find the backs of her thighs, and then I hoist her up onto the countertop. Situating myself between her legs, I return my mouth to hers.
If only eighteen-year-old Gabe could see me now… All I wanted back then was for Hallie to give me a chance. Finally getting to kiss her—to fuck her—is better than my wildest dreams. I want to soak her in and let her flood my veins.
Hallie pulls back, but then she presses a kiss to my jaw and runs her fingers along the waistband of my sweatpants. I grabher hand, bringing it away from my groin, and interlace our fingers.
I raise a brow. “That is a dangerous game, Hallie. One we don’t have time for. Though I will gladly show you how I would have won later.”
She laughs, shaking her head. “You’re rather cocky this morning, Bowman.”
“Happy,” I correct. “The word you’re looking for is happy.”
Hallie’s expression softens, and her usual blush spreads across her cheeks. “I’m happy, too.”
I press another kiss to her lips. “Good.”
“I’ll be even happier if you show me what you made me for breakfast, though.”
I chuckle, helping her down from the island. The eggs and veggie bacon, which I have come to appreciate, are a little cold once we get to them, but we don’t care. We eat quickly, stealing glances at one another. Hallie’s blush seems to be permanent at this point. I love it.
