Page 35 of Fangs & Freaks
I turn sharply, my chest heaving as my gaze lands on the most terrifyingly beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. She’s tall and elegant, her dark hair cascading in perfect waves around a face that’s equal parts angelic and menacing. Her eyes… they burn with an inner fire that makes me want to bow and run at the same time.
Bellonna growls, staring at the intruder. “Lilith,” she says, her tone a mix of annoyance and reverence. “Did you have to come now and ruin my post-fuck high?”
Lilith smirks, unfazed by the disrespect. “Three hundred years, and you’re still as disrespectful as ever.” Her gaze shifts to me, and I feel like she’s looking straight into my soul.
“Lilith?” I whisper before being able to help it. “The queen of Hell?”
“Quiet, young unicorn,” she says, silencing the words forming on my lips. “The grown-ups are talking.”
Bellonna rolls her eyes, but says nothing as Lilith continues. “You’ve been marked, Bellonna. A mate marking.”
The words hit me like a punch to the gut. “Mate?” I gasp, my voice barely audible.
Lilith holds up a hand to silence me again. “As I’ve told you before, Bellonna, you weren’t cursed to be alone. You made that up in that pretty little head of yours. But let me remind you… mates or not, you are still mine to wield when needed. Your mates can help or let you be, but you are still the blade of the devil.”
Bellonna sighs, her frustration evident. “I never thought differently. You can go now. I want to fuck my unicorn again.”
Lilith’s smirk deepens and with a wave of her hand, she vanishes, leaving behind only the faint scent of smoke and power.
I stare at Bellonna, my mind racing. “My mate?” I repeat, the words tasting foreign on my tongue. “I marked you? I didn’t know that was possible for a unicorn. I stabbed you.”
Bellonna shrugs, her lips curling into a teasing smile. “I liked it.”
Her nonchalance is too much. I pull out of her and get to my feet, heading to the bathroom. My mind is a whirlwind ofemotions as I step into the shower, letting the hot water cascade over me. I’m upset, confused, and… aroused, damn it.
What the hell have I gotten myself into?
Chapter Nineteen
Bellonna
Varys closesthe bathroom door behind him. It’s just a soft click, but the sound hits me like a roaring thunderclap in the silence that encases the room. My breath catches in my throat, my chest tightening with an ache so deep it feels like my ribs might crack under the weight of it. He just left the room, without so much as a word. He just walked away from me, carrying his pain with him.
I stand frozen, staring at the door as if it might swing back open, as if he might change his mind and come back. But the stillness mocks me, and the feeling that was there when we were together is now a void pulling at the edges of my world. His absence is almost tangible. It feels as if the air has thinned, and breathing has now become a conscious effort.
“What do I do?” I ask myself softly, the words filled with pain and confusion. I never thought I’d have a mate. I thought it was my destiny to be alone forever.
“He’ll come around, Bellonna.” Lilith’s voice startles me out of my thoughts and I turn to face her.
“I thought I told you to leave?”
“I did, but heard you questioning yourself,” she says as she steps towards me. “You must realize he’s young, and this is new. His situation is not typically how you find out you have a mate, especially one as powerful and feared as you. Now, where your mate is concerned, that is for you to decide. It doesn’t change the destiny you have before you. Either he’s there by your side, or you let him go. Reject his mate bond, cut his mark from your skin, and live with the agony that will cause the both of you.” With her final words, Lilith leaves just as quickly as she arrived, leaving me alone and with a million thoughts running through my head.
I can feel it—his pain, raw and heavy, radiating like heat. It clings to the air, wrapping around me, cutting through the confusion that churns in my mind. Why didn’t he stay? Why didn’t he continue to service me like the obedient toy he should be? No, instead of allowing me to shoulder some of the weight I know he’s carrying with this new discovery, he leaves the room without even a word. Questions circle my mind, replaying like a broken record, relentless and sharp, each one leaving me with a sharp sting and an overwhelming sense of unknowing.
He’s hurting, that much is clear, but the way he looked at me before he turned away—there was something more. Anguish? Resignation? Fear? I don’t know the name for it, but it twists like a coil deep inside me, sharp and cruel, because whatever it is, it was enough to make him leave me. Does he hate the idea of being mated to a monster like me? A cruel and unforgiving being whose sole purpose in life is to bring torment to others. I chose this world I’m part of; he didn’t. His choice was made by three twisted bitches called fates.
I want to scream, to cry, to call him back. But it’s as if my voice is blocked by a lump in my throat, and the tears refuse to fall. I hate these feelings. I cry for no one. The day I died and became this abomination, I swore I’d never shed a tear foranyone again. I’d never get close, and most importantly, no one would ever have a piece of my heart again. Yet, one call for me to help and I’ve thrown all those promises to the wind. Because whether I want to admit it or not, the unicorn has firmly seated himself in my being. Then there are the other two; the darkness within them swirls around me, consuming me in a way that’s so intense I can’t stop thinking of them. Anyone else I would’ve ended by now, long bored with the game, but with those two, I haven’t.
Two souls of darkness, and one of purity. They wrap around my soulless being, making me feel things I don’t want to. I hate this. Feeling this way. I want it to end, but there’s fear of what it will be like to be alone again. All I can do is stand here, replaying the moment over and over in my mind, each time hoping for a different ending. But there’s not one. Varys is my mate. Linked to me for eternity.
The silence grows heavier, pressing down on me like a weight. Memories rush back to me of the day I died, the pain I felt underneath the stones as they crushed me, cutting off more of my air as each second ticked by. But this is even more suffocating than that was. The helplessness of watching Varys retreat into his pain, refusing to let me in. And yet, beneath it all, there was a flicker of something else—something colder. Hurt. The sting of being shut out, of having my presence cast aside, knowing I wasn’t enough to make him stay and process this new development together.
Is this what it’s like having a mate? The unyielding torment and worry. The fear of being rejected. How far have I fallen that I’m letting a man—no, men—cause me this much heartache? I’m fucking Bloody Mary! I don’t let anyone have power over me.
Yet, I’m letting Varys.
I wrap my arms around myself, as if I could hold myself together in the face of everything I can’t understand. My chestaches, my mind races, and my heart thuds with a rhythm that feels uneven, out of sync. Somewhere deep down, I know he isn’t just walking away from me- he’s running from his own demons. Or maybe it's the demon side of me. But it doesn't make it hurt any less.
