Page 81 of Scout
“You are.” He nudges her with his elbow. “It’s going good. I’m exhausted, but now that court is over, I think that will get better. I was just nervous as hell.”
“It went pretty damn well, I think,” Xavier adds.
Scout sips his water. “It did.” Then, like he’s forcing himself to say it, “I’m glad you were there.”
“You told me when,” Xavier says. “And you didn’t say not to.”
“Yeah, but I didn’t think you’d actually show.”
“Well… we did.”
“Even if I didn’t show it—or honestly even feel it in the moment—I’m thankful we had a friendly face in the crowd. Sorry. I’m sure my face said otherwise. It was a lot, and I was terrified.”
“We’re all grown,” I smirk. “We can handle a little glare or even resting bitch face. Like Xavier said earlier, we’re not here to push,” I tell him. “Or assume anything. We’re just glad to be here for both of you.”
He nods once. “Yeah. Me too, I think.”
Juniper excuses herself to use the bathroom, and that’s when things shift.
Scout rests his arms on the table. It takes everything I have not to reach out. He clears his throat. “I’ve been thinking about what we said back at the courthouse.”
My stomach clenches. “Yeah?”
“I heard you that weekend. And yeah, I said that already. But.” He pauses, eyes on the table. “It hurt. More than I expected. But… I think part of me needed to hear it, too.”
Xavier leans in. “Scout…”
“I know you love each other. That’s not what I’m struggling with anymore.” He looks up. “I’m struggling with what that means for me. If there’s room. If I ever belonged at all.”
His voice doesn’t shake, but it’s close.
I speak quietly. “There’s love between us, yeah. History, yes. But Scout?—”
He flinches a little. Not at my tone. At the word.Love.
But I don’t stop, because this part matters. He needs to hear it. “—I never expected you. And I sure as hell didn’t expect to fall for you.”
He shakes his head. “You barely know me.”
“I know more than you think. I know you make me want to be softer. Better. More honest. I know you care about Juniper in ways people dream of being loved. I know that when you left, it felt like something vital got ripped out of my chest.”
Scout doesn’t look at me, but he’s listening.
Xavier’s voice is steadier now. “It’s not about asking you to pick up where we left off. It’s just—if there’s still a window open, we’re here. We’re not walking away.”
Scout swirls his straw in the condensation ring his milkshake made. “I have this life now. A kid. A job I can’t talk about at PTA meetings.”
I smile. “Juniper already approved of us.”
He rolls his eyes. “She approves of chaos. This is a girl who poured hot sauce into a Gatorade bottle and told me it was a ‘surprise flavor.’ She’s not exactly a moral compass.”
“She’s also the reason we didn’t give up,” Xavier adds gently.
Scout exhales. “She wants me to write a book.”
I grin. “About us?”
“About my messed-up life. Including you two clowns.”
