Page 114 of Ridin' True
“I know how selfish that sounds—but the thing is, your life is not your own. Neither is mine. You’re not you without me, and I’m not me—” I choked on the knot in my throat, but willed myself to finish, “I'm not me without you. So…”
I had to stop again to keep myself from sobbing. It didn’t help at all that as Alejandro stared at me, his own eyes began to overflow with silent tears.
When I managed to get ahold of myself, I continued, “So you can’t leave me. No matter what happens, no matter how mad at you I am, Icannotlive without you. So you can’t die. You have to get better, Alejo. Promise me. Promise—”
When he began to weep, I gave up and let myself do the same. I sat on the edge of the bed and pulled him into my arms, and we held each other until we were all cried out.
“I don’t want to die,” he whispered against my shoulder.
I squeezed my eyes closed, tightening my hand around the nape of his neck, caught off guard by how much I needed to hear him say that.
“I know. I know,mellizo,” I assured him.
“I’ll go to rehab. Wherever you want me to go, I’ll do it. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for everything.”
His arms constricted around me tighter than I thought possible for someone in his condition. For a while, we both let his apology wrap itself around us as we held on to one another. When he seemed to lose his burst of strength, his arms going slack, I gave him one more squeeze before I let him go.
I wiped away the snot and the tears which had collected on my upper lip, then kissed the side of his head as I murmured, “I forgive you. Always.”
He nodded weakly, wiping at his nose as he muttered, “I love you.”
“Yeah, well, I love you more.” I wiped my own cheeks dry then reached for my phone. After unlocking the screen, I handed it to him and insisted, “Here. Call mami. I’m sure she’d love to hear your voice.”
Two Months Later
I’dbeeninstructedtostay in bed until they were ready. It was Sunday, which meant Nicole would be by to pick up the kids later that afternoon. My big day was still twenty-four hours away, but that morning, the kids and Jed insisted on a celebratory breakfast. None of the Barkers could truly be trusted in the kitchen, but I couldn’t deny them.
Tomorrow, the doors of The Law Office of Alexia Torres would officially be open for business. I could hardly believe it. After my first month as general counsel for the Wild Stallions, I felt ready to add to my workload and do all I set out to accomplish when I agreed to take the job. As promised, Jed connected me with a local realtor. I didn’t think I’d find the right space so quickly, but she was no joke. Before I knew it, I was registering my business in Gillette.
One more sleep, and my dream of hanging my own shingle would become a reality.
If someone would have told be that over the course ofonesummer, I’d become the general counsel for the Wild Stallions Motorcycle Club, I’d start my own private practice, and I’d be grafted into my own little family, I wouldn’t have imagined it even remotely possible. Even living in that truth didn’t feel real sometimes. Except, rather than pinch myself when it felt too good to be true, all I needed was to look down at my right wrist for my reminder that life wasn’t just good, it was incredible.
The ink was only a couple of weeks old, and I often found myself staring at it, in awe of what it meant and the promises permanently etched into my skin. I knew I wasn’t Jed’s first ol’ lady, but I was certain I was his last. Much like my man didn’t need a marriage license to hold him to the commitment he made to his woman, he hadn’t insisted on branding me. He offered the option of my own kutte instead, but that didn’t sit right with me.
I was still learning what it meant to be a Stallion and the gravity of my own involvement with the club—as their legal representationandan ol’ lady. Nevertheless, the ink every member wore, as well as the branding of the women they loved, it all seemed too significant to overlook.
My black and gray cowboy stood with his hat tipped down, covering his face. He swung two lassos—one over his head, spinning around his torso, and the other at his hip, spinning around his boots. It was a simple, dainty homage to the skeletal cowboy Jed had tattooed on his side, representing the wrangler he was.
Bella still thought I was crazy, and mami hated it; but Jed loved it, and so did I.
While I waited on breakfast—laughing to myself at the commotion I heard in the kitchen—I worked on my latest letter to Alejandro.
He’d spent the last month and a half at a rehab facility in Montana. He was completely unplugged, and he asked us not to visit so he could really focus on his recovery. It was hard, but we respected his wishes. Since we couldn’t call him, we wrote him letters instead. He’d been slow to respond at first, and he’d still only sent mami and Bella a couple of letters—but he and I were up to half a dozen, each envelope coming with increasing frequency.
He still had forty-three days left, but I could hardly wait to see him. I could tell he was really trying. He seemed good, and his spirits sounded lifted and positive. With each letter we wrote, our relationship healed a little bit, and then a little bit more, and that lifted my spirits, too.
I was practically floating through life recently.
After that day in the hospital, the drama in my life had taken a much needed hiatus. It took a little while for me to figure out what normal looked like—with my new job, my new living arrangement, my new family—but figuring it out had been delightful. I was surrounded by the most amazing community of people. I got to spend time with a couple of the coolest kids on the planet. And I was still convinced Jed Barker was Prince Charming on steroids with a biker ‘stache.
“Lex! Breakfast is ready,” Axel hollered.
I looked up, grinning at the closed bedroom door, and called back, “Coming!” before setting aside my letter to finish later.
Certain everyone else was still in their sleep clothes, I didn’t bother to change out of mine. I went to join my family in one of Jed’s tees and the pair of sleep shorts I donned after he made love to me earlier, before the kids were up.
The kitchen was an actual disaster area, and my jaw fell open at the sight of it.
