Page 16 of Ridin' True
“No,” I shook my head and pulled in a deep breath through my nose, determined not to shed a single tear. “No.”
“Lexi…”
“No, Alejo. No! As a matter of fact, I don’t have ten grand on hand.”
It was true. I had nine, but I wasn’t about to tell him that. There was no way I was draining my savings to cover hisdrug debt.
“You’re lying.”
“Don’t. Don’t talk to me about lying,” I said, slowly backing my way toward the door. “You’re the liar. You’ve been lying to all of us, for I don’t even know how long. And I don’t want to know. I can’t help you. Not this time.”
“Alexia.” He stood to his feet. “I’m begging you. I don’t know what he’ll do to me.”
I wasn’t going to be able to hold back my tears much longer. I needed to get out of there. I was angry and disappointed, but his fear made me scared, too.
“I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep saving you. None of us can, don’t you see that? You need to learn how to save yourself, Alejo. For once in your life, be a grown up and figure it out.”
I turned on my heel and hurried toward the door.
My hand was reaching for the handle when he cried, “You’re a real pretentious bitch, you know that?”
My breath caught as my first tear fell.
His words pierced me straight through, and I felt a pain I’d never experienced before—the sharp edges of his declaration scraping at my insides, leaving a ripped, gnarly, bloody wound.
I paused and tried to swallow the knot clogging my throat.
I didn’t have it in me to face him as I muttered over my shoulder, “I love you too,mellizo.”
As soon as I was in the hallway, I sped out of there as fast as my feet could carry me in my heels. When I was behind the wheel of my car, I buried my face in my hands and let myself cry.
I wasn’t sure what I just did or what fate would befall him without my help—but I couldn’t do it. No matter how much I loved him, this was too much. He’d gone too far. And what hurt the most was that he couldn’t see the way he made me no more than his ATM.
He didn’t take into consideration my safety or my wellbeing.
He didn’t care about my hopes and my dreams.
We shared a womb and a life, and tonight all I was good for was ten grand.
The moment I said no, I wasn’t his twin or his best friend, I was only thepretentious bitchwith no interest in selling my soul.
When my sob had subsided, I started my car and began my journey home.
I hated knowing when I got there I’d be all alone.
I needed a friend, but I didn’t have one I could burden with this. Even though I grew up in Gillette, I’d lost touch with most of the girls I hung out with in high school. They were either married with children or gone to another town and another life. I didn’t really have friends at work, either. Cora was great, but we weren’t that close. In truth, I hadn’t let anyone get that close in a while. I was so busy trying to get ahead in my career and keep up with life’s obstacles, I had only myself to blame.
Upon reaching my apartment complex, I parked in my usual spot and wiped away the last of my tears. Wallowing wasn’t going to help me feel better. For a second, I thought about calling Bella—but I didn’t want to worry her and mami. Selfish as it was, I didn’t have the capacity to be strong for all of us.
I forced myself out of my car and trudged my way up to my unit.
My stomach growled as I let myself in, but I wasn’t in the mood to cook.
Instead, I kicked off my heels, discarded my purse, and headed for the freezer.
A half a pint of mint-chocolate chip ice cream greeted me.
There was fat, protein, and carbs in ice cream.
