Page 59 of Ridin' Free
“She’s easy and convenient. If it wasn’t true, I might feel bad saying it—but it is. She’s been after Twister since the moment she arrived on the compound. If I wasn’t sporting Bull’s ink and his ring, it would be his lap she was trying to mount in an effort to claim the title she’s been chasing.
“She doesn’t want just any Stallion. The higher his rank, the better. It just so happens Twister’s easy on the eyes and he’s got that beard. If I’m being honest, I don’t blame her. I prefer a beard between my thighs, too.”
Jenna snickered, and I saw it as she and Alexia shared a look—but Winnie wasn’t finished.
“I’m sure I don’t need to tell you their history; but here’s something you should consider. He’s slept with her plenty—but he’s also seen her take another brother’s cock. No man, and I meanno manclaims an ol’ lady who’s been around the club the way she has. I don’t care how tight her ass is.”
“You probably should be more worried about the last time he got tested.”
“Jenna,” chided Alexia.
“What?” she replied with sheepish shrug. “I’m just saying. Not to get in your business, but if you two get serious and he doesn’t want to wrap it up, just make sure he’s good. I mean, I’m sure you don’t need me to tell you that. But as a healthcare professional, it felt like my duty to say it. Not to mention, I’vebeen inside that clubhouse enough to know—just—you know…gross.”
I smiled, relieved to feel amused. “Yeah. Got it,” I assured her. “I don’t imagine we’re headed toward serious, but I’ll certainly keep that in mind.”
“Wherever you’re headed, don’t forgot this conversation. And trust me, Twister’s a wild one, but he’s no liar. There’s a reason he’s VP. He’s got more integrity than you might realize. Not to mention, if he does you wrong, he’ll have more than one brother to answer to.”
I nodded, wanting to take her words at face value. A lot had been said, and I knew I needed to sit with it for a minute.
“Thanks,” I murmured. I then picked up my sandwich and, in an effort to lighten the mood, said, “Tell Tess we’ve only been out twice. If she comes into the bar tryin’ to make plans for a double date or some shit, I’m gonna pretend I don’t know what she’s talkin’ about.”
Grinning, Jenna promised, “I’ll tell her. Doesn’t mean she’ll listen.”
“Yeah. I suspect you’re right.”
We finished our meal, and conversation kept us at the table for a little while longer. When Jenna got a text from Maverick, she told us that was her cue to head home. Alexia and Winnie needing to get back to work themselves, we said our goodbyes and went our separate ways.
I arrived on the compound thirty minutes before I needed to be at Steel Mustang. I sat in my Bronco, in the back of the parking lot, for ten of those minutes, replaying the conversation we had at lunch about Twister. I suppose I shouldn’t have been surprised by the confidence each of them had in the Stallions’ VP. Much of what they said matched up with the things Twister said and the way he acted. This truth coupled withmy exhaustion—the result of a restless night on account of the tension between us—made me confront the reality of it all.
I had to trust him. If we were going to move forward, it was my only choice. The doubts I harbored, the insecurities that were creeping out of the dark corners of my mind, they weremyproblem. They were the baggage of my history; a history I didn’t share with anyone. Whereas, Twister had been completely open and honest about the pieces of him that were messy and imperfect. He’d lived his life openly. His track record was documented by the people with whom he spent all of his time.
If I wanted him—and it would be ridiculous to say I didn’t—I had to take him how he came. It would be unfair of me, of all people, to demand more.
When I got out of my vehicle, I strapped my bag over my shoulder and started to make my way toward Horsepower Auto-Supply.
I made it halfway across the lot when I changed my mind, realizing I wasn’t quite sure what I was going to say to him.
As I turned around, headed for the bar, I considered how, maybe, simply showing up would say enough.
I turned around again, aiming to walk into the store.
I took five steps before I changed my mind.Again. It was the middle of the afternoon, and I wasn’t in the mood to make a scene.
Hoping he’d do what he always did, and I’d find him propped up against my car at the end of the night, I headed for the bar and got to work.
It was nearlytwo-thirtythe next morning when Rodeo, Buck, and I said our goodbyes. I locked up the bar and headed for my Bronco. Twister wasn’t there.
I climbed behind the wheel and started the engine, but I didn’t go anywhere right away. I thought about the consequences of another night with this unresolved conflict between us. I wasn’t sure how I managed to get here; how I became that woman who needed to know where she stood with a man. I didn’t even know this part of me had survived the wreckage of my marriage, my abuse, mylife—but my stomach ached at the thought of Twister pulling away from me, knowing I was the one who pushed him first.
I was tired.
Tired of fighting.
Tired of losing.
Tired of bracing myself at every moment of every day.
I wanted to let go.
