Page 32 of Healing the Leonid Doctor's Heart
Last night’s sexual confidence felt like a bad dream, a practical joke, a prank Marcus had played on her.
There is no way he believes I can be a mother or a wife.
She tried to erase all the memories of their passion, of his words, of the feel of his paws caressing her as he whispered, “My Queen.”
I was the happiest I’d ever been.
For one whole day.
Even though she told herself she was being silly, Abigail curled into a ball, knees to her chest, and cried.
“ABI? CAN I COME IN?”
Abi raised her head and realized she had cried herself to sleep, and now Marcus’ voice was booming in the intercom.
“Come in!” she called, sitting up, wiping her face for traces of long-dried tears, knowing she must look horrible. Her eyes were probably puffy, and her lips were dry.
He’s your employer now, isn’t he? Whether he’ll ever be anything more doesn’t matter. If you don’t want to be fired, you’d better be calm and polite, she coached herself as the door slid up and revealed Marcus standing outside.
“I’ve gone over the first few files,” she said with a forced smile.
“Fuck the files. I did something wrong, and I know it. I’m here to fix it. I’m not stupid, Abi—no, Iamstupid, because I hurtyou. I did something, I didn’t realize it was wrong, and I still don’t know what I did, but I’m not stupid enoughnotto try to fix it. I’m not going to avoid it and hope it works itself out.”
She had to admit that it was a refreshing approach, but it didn’t fix matters. “I’m fine, Marcus.”
“No, you’re not. Things were so good between us last night. Now things are stiff, and not in the ‘I’m so aroused by my Queen and I cannot get enough of her’ way.”
“Marcus... I can’t be your Queen. I can’t be your surrogate. Look at the age range you suggested. Twenty to thirty-two years old. I’m forty-five!”
He looked surprised. “Is that what’s wrong? No, that can’t be all of it.”
“Well, no, but it’s some of it,” she admitted, hugging herself and shuddering as the post-sleep tremors overtook her.
“I’m making you some tea and something to eat.”
“You don’t have to.”
“No, but I want to. I want you to be my Queen, Abi, and that means I want to care for you,” Marcus said, stepping close to her, but stopping before he touched her. “That age range isn’t for me. It’s for the candidate pool. Statistically speaking, and by numbers, nothing more, a woman on Sapien-Three has a peak fertility rate during those years. The rate drops before and after that window. It doesn’t mean there aren’t women who are having children well before or after those numbers. But for this trial to work, show success, and expand, I have to give it every chance of success. That’s it. That’s why I picked the numbers. If this were... If this were not about a medical trial, I’d say to hell with every rule or regulation. Let people find themselves whatever suits them. But it’s not. Leonid Kings and Knights are going to risk their family’s lineage and their fortunes on this trial. Women from your planet are going to have to travel to a new galaxy and have sex with a stranger, give birth, andbring hope to a whole generation of suffering Felids. Abi, I can’t jeopardize this initial study. I also specified women with hormonal markers in certain ranges, too. Not just the clinically acceptable ranges, but thepeakof the ranges.”
“Oh.” Of course. When she considered it rationally, she felt silly, but Marcus didn’t make her feel that way. There was pleading in his eyes and his voice, his paws held out to her.
She took one. “You said Felids get attached to their women. Possessive.”
“It’s true.”
“And I’m here. Available. It was either me or Kaylie, and—”
“What?” Marcus snatched his paw back, massive jaw slack with shock. “I’m sorry, I said we get attached and possessive of the Queens we’re with because it’s true. But it’s not any or all females. It’s who wechoose.”
“Right, and there’s not a lot of choice on this ship.” Abigail gestured vaguely with one hand. “Not a lot of Queens around here, are there? Not even in the whole galaxy, let alone the ship.”
“Before you, there was Layla, Wendy, Jade, and Nessa, not to mention all the lovely young Queens who had been sent to Lynx-Nineteen. I saw Layla before Rupex did, and I took care of Nessa for days while she was recovering, before Kamau became her lover. I’ve had choices, Abigail. I happen to prefer you. I choose you, because of your smile, and your sweetness, and your good, sturdy heart, and this quiet invincibility you give off. Your age and your convenience don’t mean a damn thing to me.” With a sudden snarl, he scooped her up, kissing her hard as he carried her in a cradle hold. “Do you need me to remind you of how much I want you to be my Queen?”
God, yes, she wanted to be reminded. But... “But you gave me that job offer. That one, to be some sort of database warmer, not one for being a surrogate. Do you think I won't be able to do it? Am I only going to be useful to this program as someone who canhandle files and data?” she asked in a small voice, trying not to let herself give in and snuggle into his strong, furry arms.
“I need someone excellent on my team. That’s you. Do I want you to work by my side because you’re smart and reliable, not to mention kind and compassionate? Manes and tails, of course I do! Do I want you tobe inthe trial? No. Why? Because I want you to myself. I want to be the one to make love to you. To fuck your pretty little pussy and breed you, to fill you with my cum. If we have a dozen cubs or no cubs at all, it doesn’t matter to me. I realize that more with every passing moment. Abi,youmake me happy. Just you. Not the possibility of cubs.”
“Marcus. There must be some part of you that wants children?”
