Page 41 of Healing the Leonid Doctor's Heart
“Girl, don’t even. We can hear you all the way in... Well, everywhere.”
“What?” Abi’s face flushed hot, and then paled.
Everyone will know. Everyone will know if I fail. And they’ll hate me for making Marcus choose a woman who can’t give him a child when he’s about to have thousands of applicants and could choose the very best for himself.
“No stress, Big Sis! I’ve been calling this forever, you know that. Jaxson says every Felid or Canid would have clocked it anyway. Something about the scent a Queen in heat gives off.” Kaylie paused, mouth slightly open. “Wait, Jax said ‘in heat.’ Abi! Does that mean you’re going to have a—”
“Shhh! No. I mean, I don’t know. We’re trying.”
“So, you’re also taking a side contract? As a surrogate? Or is this just as a friends-with-benefits thing?” Kaylie’s brown eyes sparkled like embers off a misfiring engine. “Or more than friends?”
It was on the tip of Abigail’s tongue to tell the younger woman to mind her own business.
But I need someone to talk to, and Kamau and Nessa are so busy, and Wendy just had a baby. Layla’s got the cubs, plus her work, and Jade is pregnant and getting ready to open up a store at the ass-end of the galaxy...“I want it to be more than friends. I would love that more than anything.”
“Oooh! Honey, I’m so happy for you!” Kaylie squealed, squeezing her until her ribs complained.
“I said I wanted that. I’m not so sure it is. I... I think things might be different for Felids. I don’t know how much love enters into things when you’re in survival mode. I’m old-fashioned, I suppose. I dream about romance, but what Marcus and I have is—” her eyes clouded with lust, and the hot, rampant urge to have him fuck her and fill her again came soaring back, almost making it impossible to speak, “very, very nice. Wonderful. Passionate. Logical. Friendly. Ideal.”
“But you don’t sound like you’re one-hundred-percent happy with the ideal?” Kaylie said hesitantly.
“I’ll be better once I know this booster worked. I know it might take several cycles.”
“The booster? To have a baby?”
“A cub, yes.”
“That’s all this is, you both want a cub? What if you can’t have one? You never tried before this, right? Some women can’t, and they don’t know the reason.”
“Marcus said my numbers were good!” she snapped suddenly, standing and rising. “I have to go. Injections.” She swooshed off, leaving Kaylie looking confused and anxious behind her.
MARCUS RUBBED PAW SALVEinto Abigail’s back and arms, looking at the small, round bruises the injections had created, even with alternating the injection site. “My warrior Queen, withall of her battle scars. Our cub is going to be the luckiest one in the universe, I think. Layla is a dear, but she’s loud and flashy. Jade can seem so cold and forbidding. Wendy, Bastet bless her, such a timid little thing, even though she’s coming out of her shell. You, my Abi, have this quiet, resilient, unconquerable strength. In the best way, you remind me of my Kaya, rest her soul.”
Marcus pulled his paws away as he realized Abi’s shoulders were shaking. Tears streamed down her cheeks silently. “My Queen!”
“What if there are no cubs, Marcus? You... I know what we said, but doesn’t a Queen have a duty to her King? Doesn’t she have to let him go free if being with her wouldn’t be the best choice? Would take away the good things he deserves?” she whispered, trying to compose herself as she lay on his bed, a black silk sheet held across her naked chest.
“What? I’ve already told you that—”
“It’s not enough. It’s not enough for me, Marcus. I’m sorry. I mean, if we have a cub, it is, of course! But for me to stand in your way of finding a Queen you truly love—”
Marcus knew it was rude and the timing was terrible, but he let out a short, explosive “Ha!”
Abigail stared back at him with red-rimmed eyes and drew herself up slowly, regal grace in every inch of her sweet features. “It’s not laughable to me. My planet has so few marriages. Only the richest can afford it. Love is inconvenient, a sacrifice most people on Sapien-Three are reluctant to make. Pleasure Parks exist to meet physical needs, but hearts go empty. I thought... I thought I could be selfish enough, Marcus, to make a life without love—oh, not for me, but for you. It’s okay if you never love me, but you’d have a son or daughter to fill your heart in that special way. If I can’t give you that, and you don’t love me, you just enjoy me... It’s not fair to you. I won’t have it.”
“My Queen,” Marcus knelt down on one knee, shaking his head at her as he seized her hands in his paws, “I laughed out of sheer amazement that I have hidden my thoughts so well. That’s all, Abi. I have been falling in love with you since you first looked into my eyes when you were coming to—months ago. I couldn’t even place it at first, such a long-forgotten, painful feeling. And I was a cowardly one, oh, so shameful, a Leonid being cowardly, but there you have it. Kaya died and broke my heart into a thousand pieces. I never expected it to heal. I never expected this old heart to work right again.”
Abigail licked her lips, confusion in her eyes slowly giving way to hope. “But we talked, and you never said—”
“You never said either! Not until tonight! Youstillhaven’t said, but I’m finally brave enough to read between the lines. You said you couldn’t be selfish with me. I have been trying not to be selfish with you. I’m old, sweetie.”
“You aren’t!”
“I’m in my fifties, and you look like you’re thirty-five if you’re a day.”
“I don’t!”
“Abigail, hush!” He showed his teeth, only realizing that his heart was racing when she smiled just a little, and it slowed at the sight. “You don’t realize that I could set you down on any planet and the rulers of it, their handsome young sons, their virile actors, their wealthy magnates—they would all rush to you, and it would have not a single damn thing to do with your ability to give them a cub. It would be for your love. Your companionship. Your beauty. The sweet calmness you bring into any room—and then the wicked, wild streak you would show them...” Marcus sank back, eyes closed at the memories of their torrid nights and secret, frantic meetings in the day. “I shouldn’t keep you from that—but you are my friend, and you chose me. You would honor me by having my cub. But if youcan’t... I should let you go to be some rich Leopardine’s wife, to be covered in jewels and paraded around like a goddess. Do you realize you could have that?”
