Page 126 of Unrivaled Love
I press the button and immediately my body spasms. "Oh god, Bryson, I'm there. I'm right there."
"Grab your tit Jo, show me." He says and I watch his eyes focus in on my hand as I massage my tit and then move to the other. I can see the screen bouncing as he jerks himself harder.
"Yes, oh, yes." I cry out as the first tingles travel through my veins. My eyes flutter shut.
"That's it Josie, let go." Bryson says and I open my eyes to see him staring at me. "You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."
That does it for me and I shatter. I soar higher than I’ve ever been and then the world comes tumbling down.
I turn to see Bryson has closed his eyes and he slowly strokes himself to finish. With a final exhale he releases his grip on his cock and pulls his t-shirt off to clean himself up.
"Fucking hell Jo, that was intense."
"Yeah," I agree but I don't feel relieved or even glowy. My chest is tight and emotion sits heavily behind my eyes. He’s not here to hold me. I’m not able to hold him.
"What's wrong?" He asks.
“Nothing, I'm fine." I'm quick to say but my words are thick with my gathering tears.
"You're not, what can I do?"
"Nothing."
"C'mon Jo there's got to be something."
"No. There isn't. Unless you can fly here and hold me right now there's nothing you can do.” My words convey the frustration I’m feeling. “I missyou, Bryson. I miss talking to you and seeing your stupid face and being with you. I don't know if I can do this anymore."
"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where is this coming from? Jo.” He slides his pants up and gets closer to the screen. “Josie, we just got each other off so well because we’re incredible together and I know it's not the same to do this over the phone but you'll be finishing up your season soon and then you can come here for a bit."
"And then go back to not being with you when the season starts again? I don’t know if I can, Bryson.” I hate that my doubt is speaking for me. I want to be strong for him. Be his Killer. But this distance is wearing me out.
"I know baby, I know.” He brushes the screen to try and wipe the tears that are spilling down my cheeks. I don’t know where this emotion is coming from. “This isn't easy. This fucking hurts. I crave you. I walk around in a fog all day dreaming of you. But I'm not a quitter. I will not quit on us."
"I'm not a quitter either." I insist but some of the power is diminished by the weakness in my voice.
"Oh, baby, I want to hold you so badly. You know that right? You know I'm over here suffering just as much as you are, if not more.” He pauses. “You're way hotter than I am."
A soggy laugh escapes me.
"Sure." I roll my eyes and check what my face looks like in the camera. It's splotchy and snotty and I don't look good at all.
"No, it's true. You're it for me Jo and you're perfect and I hate that we're apart. Watching you cry is killing me. I wish I had a solution but I won't let either of us give up on our sport for the other. And I won’t let either of us give up on what we have either."
I wipe my nose with the back of my hand. "Okay."
"Okay?"
"Yeah, I'll be fine. Just, it's been a lot."
"I know Josie, I know. ” He reassures me. “We'll figure it out. We'll get better at this. We need to practice it."
"You're right." I tell him because he is. I have little experience with relationships in general and never with a long distance one. We need to practice. We need to condition our hearts to handle this just like we train for our careers.
"You better, Killer?" He asks and I smile.
"Yeah, just got overwhelmed. I'm good."
"It's okay to get overwhelmed. I feel it too. I gotta get to the rink but I'll text you later."
