Page 95 of Unrivaled Love
"You’re still in your funk." Crosby informs me.
I push a breath out of my puffed cheeks. If any of the guys are going to get it Crosby will. Talking this out with him might do me good.
"I fucking broke at the BBQ last night."
"What do you mean?"
"After Cap had me say a few words my ears started ringing and I ran upstairs to try and breathe right again."
"Shit, I'm sorry man. That is the scariest feeling. How'd you get out of it?"
"Jo."
"Good."
We let the radio do the talking for us for the rest of the drive to the hotel. Crosby can be quiet at times which I appreciate even if I’m never the quiet one when we’re in a group. When I pull up to the entrance I put the car in park.
I wipe a hand down my face and sigh. "I just, I don't know how to get back into it." I admit before Crosby gets out.
"Into what?" He says as he turns to me.
"Into winning. I worked my whole fucking life to get here and now that I have it's like all the drive has drained out of me."
I breathe heavily releasing the frustration I’ve held inside for too long.
"Why did you start to play hockey?" Crosby asks after a beat.
I think back to being a kid and my dad fitting me into my first pair of skates. One of my friends from school said he was going to play hockey and I wanted to do it with him. Dad took me to the second hand sports equipment store and we got my first pair of skates.
I let out a laugh.
"What?" Crosby asks.
"I started playing because my friend was playing. My first time out on the ice I had two left skates."
"Really?"
"Yeah. We got them used and it wasn't until the instructor pulled me aside and had me wave my dad over that we figured it out."
"You didn’t quit?"
“No way. Even with two left skates I stayed for the whole lesson. I loved it. We got a better fitting pair and I kept going back."
"Maybe that's what you need to do then."
"What?"
"Try skating on two left skates again."
"I don't think my old ass bones could handle that. Our poor training staff would have to spend weeks massaging my foot."
"Or Jo could!" Crosby crows and I laugh. "But seriously,” he continues, “this season is going to be different. We've got to start at 0-0-0 again. The locker room will be different. But, we have to lead with love for the game or we won't get anywhere."
I nod my head. "Yeah, that makes sense."
"’Kay I'm gonna try to get another room. We'll see you for lunch tomorrow before we fly out. Are you headed back to D.C. with us?"
"Salt Lake City for a couple of weeks first."
