Page 38 of Feuds and Interludes
I shrugged. “Sometimes. You said you thought I could do more than I was doing with Wicked Soul.”
He pressed his lips together. “Oh. Yeah. That. So, what did she say?”
I was glad he didn’t deny saying it, but I wanted to know more. Maybe not now, while I was in the middle of this whatever-the-fuck kind of crisis, but I valued his opinion more than I ever thought I would.
I was coming to realize that despite our vast differences, we hailed from the same rock lineage and, as a result, we’d had to face similar struggles to make names for ourselves as part of that legacy, as well as prove we were able to stand on our own.
I sighed, trying to release some of the tension in my shoulders. His touch was light but firm and I tried to concentrate on that contact.
“She asked me if I felt like I’d grown with this album. And for the first time, I don’t know.”
Boone nodded without looking up. He made deliberate strokes on my nails with the brush, leaning in close to observe his work.“She thinks all artists have room to grow and get better.”
“Right, but…I guess I always thought that was formeto decide, you know? I didn’t want to accept that anyone else might know what was best for my band. That doesn’t mean I don’t ever listen to feedback or that I’m not willing to take advice from Morrison, but?—”
“Isn’t that the definition of growth, though? Accepting that you don’t have all the answers?”
“I guess, but what about you? YouareStellar, for all intents and purposes. Do you collaborate for Stellar?”
“We do. I might come in with the bare bones for most of the tracks, but Annie and Bran always make them better. Bran is way better at arrangements than I am, and Annie, frankly, has a much more extensive vocabulary than I do, and she often tweaks my lyrics to make them flow better. We’re more of a democracy than not. But at the end of the day, the responsibility to be great lies solely on me.”
He blew on the first hand and moved on to the second.
“I think the difference between us, Shane? Is that I was always told Icouldandwouldmake it. I had total support from my family from the beginning. Sounds like you didn’t, and that would make it hard to trust people with your art, for sure.”
I watched him expertly apply the second coat on my left hand…and it dawned on me.
“How was I so wrong about you?”
He looked up, his blue eyes unsure, his vulnerability sucking me in.“What do you mean?”
He let go of my hand, closed up the polish bottle, and reached for the top coat. I wanted to snatch his hand back.Don’t let go.
“You’re so real, Boone. I thought you were only your stage act. Your little snotty comments, all a show. I had no idea that you…that you’d understand. And it was wrong of me to assume that everything was handed to you.”
He laughed. “Compared to you, it was. It’s true, I never had to live the shitty-apartment-off-Sunset life. I didn’t have to spend years playing in bars before I got noticed. Nepotism is a thing, man. But I fought so hard to be taken seriously…stillfight. I don’t want anyone to ever question whether I’ve earned what I’ve accomplished.”
“Which is why you don’t tell people you’re sick.”
“The focus is on the music, the performances, sales, charts. That’s what counts.”
“Boone.” I leaned in and tried to put my hand on top of his, but he pulled his hands back.
“No. You’ll mess it up.”
“Sorry.” Even with nail polish, he was a perfectionist. He used a series of tools to clean up any potentially stray marks—there weren’t any—and then he picked up my hands and blew on the nails gently. I couldn’t stop staring at his perfectly shaped lips. Makeup artists used liner to get the effect he was born with. Unbelievable.
“Boone, I’m serious. You need to tell them. You need to take care of yourself?—”
“Shhhh,” he said, standing, and then he pressed a finger against my lips. He moved to my side of the small table and knelt between my open thighs. “Don’t touch anything. These need to dry.”
He went to work on my fly, and I scooted my hips back with a jerk. “What are you doing?”
Without looking up, he pulled my cock out. “I’m not done taking care of you.”
“Boone,” I said, intending for it to meanstop, no, it’s not necessary, but it came out more likeoh, please, please do that, yes.
He took his time exploring with his tongue, that fucking metal ball driving me wild as he dragged it across my hypersensitive flesh. I reached for his hair, but he caught my wrist without losing a beat.
