Page 41 of Changing Tides
Marianne nodded her gratitude. Why not? Joey would appreciate the break from being her solitary confidante.
“Amira pushed and pushed to have a baby. I’d never imagined having children, but she said our relationship needed something to hold us together. I didn’t want to lose her, so I agreed. She’s sixteen years older than me, so there was never really a discussion about who would carry him. We found a Turkish donor so Denny would have heritage in common with her, and we made it happen.”
Kasia nodded for her to continue.
“I fell in love with Denny the moment he was lifted to my chest. I have never, for a moment, regretted having him.”
“But?”
“He didn’t have the effect on our relationship we’d hoped for. Amira was disappointed she never felt a similar rush of love, and eventually she stopped trying. Although, she was good at bringing up my initial lack of maternal feelings whenever it served her to get one over on me.”
She cleared her throat. Kasia stood and retrieved a jug of water and a glass. Marianne nodded appreciatively and took the glass.
“Thank you.” She took a sip. Kasia waited for her to continue.
“My life became completely focused on the kitchen and caring for Denny. I would come home after work, spend some time with him, and after he went to bed, I’d down a bottle of wine to get to sleep. There was no room left for anything or anyone else, and I didn’t even see it.”
“But Amira was part of the relationship, too. What did she bring?”
“She begrudgingly looked after Denny when she had to. Her mother never really bonded with Denny either. Her mum’s approval is very important to her.”
“Families can be a big influence on how we live our lives.”
Marianne nodded and wondered about Kasia’s own background. “She always goes back to her compulsive behavior when she’s unhappy. I should’ve known we couldn’t carry on like that.”
“But you are where you are now, and you need to decide what’s best for Denny most of all.”
Marianne rubbed her face. “I know. Can I have twenty-four hours to talk to Amira and make a decision?” She stood, suddenly afraid she’d shared too much.
“Of course. Go back to your shift and we’ll talk before you start tomorrow.”
As she left the office, she turned. “Thanks, Kasia. I needed to talk some of that through.”
“Any time. My door is always open.”
Marianne rushed through the rest of her shift and drove Joey’s truck back across the island to relieve her childminder. Tierney had put her in touch with Bridie, an older island resident happy to mind Denny during the day in her little cottage in the village. But Marianne liked to get Denny settled and into his own bed at night, so Tierney had also provided her with the details of Aisling, her cousin, and the daughter of the island estate agent. Seventeen and sensible, Aisling was very happy to fund her weekend shopping trips to the city with some evenings in Marianne’s house.
“Hi, Aisling.” She found the girl doing her homework in the kitchen.
“Hi, Marianne.” She started packing up her bag. “Denny was brilliant. He went straight to sleep after a story, and I’ve not heard a peep since.”
“Grand, thank you.” She handed her some notes. “Same time on Thursday?”
“Sure, see you then.”
When she was alone, she went into Denny’s room and found him fast asleep. She kissed him and pulled the covers up over his back.
When she’d avoided the temptation of the wine in the fridge and made herself a cup of tea, she pulled out her phone and called Amira. The call rang out to voicemail. She gave up and threw down the phone. Where could Amira be? She was supposed to be staying with her mum. Marianne sighed as she picked up her phone again. She couldn’t think of anyone who she’d least like to speak to, but she needed to know if Amira was okay.
“Zeynep, how are you?”
“Marianne, I wasn’t expecting to hear from you.” The antagonism in her mother-in-law’s tone made her want to punch something.
“Why not? I’m your grandson’s mother. I need to speak to Amira and she’s not picking up. I wondered if you knew where she was.”
“Of course, I do. I’m taking care of her.”
“Okay, so where is she?”
