Then, there it was. The crowded bar fell silent, watching intently, nervous and hopeful as they must have been in the live moment. I pumped my arm ready to make my pass as the Eagle’s tackles charged toward me. The ball left my hand an instant before all three of them took me down, and the video cut to my teammate catching the ball for the Super Bowl-winning touchdown.
Of course, everyone here knew that my knee was the result of that brutal tackle the cameras cut away from to cover the touchdown, but no one was talking about that tonight. No one was talking at all, actually - they were cheering like this was the first time they had seen the game-winning play.
I found myself grinning widely and modestly accepting praise from all sides. Of course, I had been congratulated a thousand times for the fantastic win, but these people were all ones I had known ever since I purchased my mansion in the Hamptons. I was their local celebrity, and hearing them cheer me on as they must have the day of the game… Well, maybe I didn’t mind birthdays so much after all.
The celebration could only go on for so long, though. Gradually, the noise level in the upscale bar returned to normal as people separated into individual groups to drink and chat. Riker, Zeke and I were no different, picking the three stools furthest to the right where the bar curved so we could chat too.
We had pretty much exhausted the topic of football for the evening, so our discussion turned to family. “How’s Elena?” Zeke asked Riker.
“Great,” Riker told us enthusiastically. “She’s made Thursday evening her moms’ night in, and she invites over a friend or two.”
“How’s your business doing?” I asked. “Last time we talked about it, you were complaining about spending too much time away from home.” Riker’s wife, Elena, and his three children lived in their Hamptons mansion while he flew to New York City every Monday for his job as the CEO of Sunset Security.
“A three-day weekend isn’t enough when I have to live in the city the other four days,” Riker told us. “If I could come home in the evening, it would be different. It doesn’t make sense to fly home every night just in time for a few hours of sleep before heading back to the city. But I’m working on the solution,” he added with a wink. “I’m in negotiations to buy out my competition here in the Hamptons. If I can close that deal, I can work out of our house and only fly back to New York periodically.”
“Just take your family with you,” Zeke suggested crossing his arms over his chest. “Claudia and I bring Jaxson to Paris with us when we go there for work.”
“That’s different,” Riker shook his head. “You and Claudia are business partners. Trust me, Elena isn’t interested in a career in security,” Riker chuckled. “Dragging the kids back and forth all the time would be a real pain in the -”
“Okay, I get it,” Zeke interrupted, throwing up his hands. “I was only joking, anyway.”
I tilted my glass toward me and watched the few drops remaining slosh around. The watchful bartender saw my dilemma and promptly whisked away the glass to make me another drink, and I immediately added to the pleasant buzz with a sip when it arrived. Riker and Zeke kept chatting about their wives and children, not noticing that I had bowed out of the conversation.
I didn’t mind listening to them go on and on about family, but the topic wasn’t really one I could talk about. Both my parents were gone, and it had been a long time since I had anyone who meant more to me than a single fun night.
My idle glance fell across one of the screens, and the animated cheerleaders performing at halftime reminded me exactly how long it had been. And not just how long it had been, but who I had been with.
Tammy. We dated in high school, said I-love-yous, and made promises we vowed to keep when we went to college, and then I ruined everything.
I had my reasons, good reasons, at least to me, for not wanting to tell Tammy “goodbye” even if it was for only a few months. So, I just left, thinking I’d call her in a week or two, expecting she would understand. But Tammy beat me to it and sent me a hate note. She spelled out the wordhatein capital letters, explaining how she hated me for leaving without saying goodbye… and how my I-love-yous had been just words and nothing more.
I tried to make amends with texts, calls and even a return letter with my explanation of why I had left so abruptly, but it was too late. Tammy had blocked my number, left for New York University, and never looked back.
Or had she? Seeing her at Zeke’s wedding had given me the shock of my life. We didn’t have time to talk before the ceremony, and after the surprise baby situation that had happened at the altar, she disappeared before I could find her. I asked Riker later, though, and he told me that she lived in the Hamptons.
“You okay?” Riker asked, waving a hand in front of my face.
“Yeah.” I pulled my thoughts back to the bustling bar. “I was just thinking about Tammy.” I nodded to the screen, where the cheerleaders were still performing, red and white pom-poms in hand. “She used to cheerlead in high school.”
“You should have lunch with her and catch up. She’s single.” Riker winked and nudged my arm.
“Yeah, well… we didn’t part on the best of terms. I doubt she wants to see me.” I tossed the words out there like I didn’t care, but I got the sense that Riker knew the truth.
“You won’t know until you ask. You’re both adults now. Maybe it’s time to kiss and make up,” Riker suggested with a mischievous twinkle in his eye.
I didn’t feel like arguing, so I just shrugged. “Maybe.” Truthfully, I never liked the way things had ended between us. Many times after I realized Tammy blocked me, and I didn’t know if she had received my letter, I almost jumped into my car and drove to New York City to explain in person. I didn’t want to say goodbye, but the total silence from Tammy after she wrote she hated me hurt more than telling her goodbye would have, I realized. Over the years, thoughts of Tammy had faded in and out of my mind.
“Honestly, it’s never too late to fix things.” This time, it was Zeke who stepped in with a serious tone. “I mean, Claudia and I dated back in high school too. Growing up puts a lot of things in perspective and opens new doors. You should talk to Tammy.”
“Maybe,” I repeated, looking away. Sensing my mood, the other guys left the subject alone and started talking motorcycles.
Maybe they were right. Maybe Tammy would be willing to talk to me and give me closure for something that had bothered me for years. But maybe she wouldn’t want to see me at all. And what if I didn’t want to face how that would turn out?
It’s Zeke’s fault.I decided, glancing sideways at the carefree Harley aficionado turned responsible family man. Both my best friends had gotten married within the last few years, and Zeke’s wedding was the most recent. Of course, I was feeling a little left out.But that’s not what I want from Tammy,I reminded myself. I just wanted to know that she didn’t still hate me. That was it.
Maybe one day soon, I would get my wish. It would be nice to talk to her, so I could finally get her out of my mind and move on with life.