Page 41 of Derailed
14
Sean
From the outside looking in,it’s been a good week. We’re back on track with the new album, and I gotta hand it to Coy; he’s got good chops. He plays as though he’s been with our band since inception, and next week we’ll finalize details for the tour. Our show isn’t over the top. Yeah, we have lights and a few special effects, but there’s no extravagant wardrobe changes or backup dancers. It makes for fairly easypreparation.
But that’s just surfacelevel.
Because inside, in my mind, there’s animosity stirring and every bit of it is directed at our new drummer. I don’t hate many people. I really don’t. But this fucker could die tomorrow and I wouldn’t shed a tear. In fact, wrong as it is, I kinda hope he trips in front of abus.
His treatment of Jess at the gala is something I can’t put out of my mind. But when I tried to mention it to Trent a few days ago, he told me to let it go.Not your relationship, Sean. Stay away from her. Let them work it out.His dismissal told me more than enough. Same as with checking up on Iz, Trent doesn’t want to hear what I have to say. And same as with checking up on Iz, I’ve ignored his advice. I won’t stop being friends with Jess. Not when I enjoy her company so much. Besides, there’s nothing inappropriate going on between us. Well, at least not in reality. Now, in my fantasies, that’s a whole different ballgame. But no one knows aboutthat.
In reality, I’m no more pathetic than some lovesick fool. I live for her smiles. I look forward to moments of shared conversation. Hell, I even wake up at the crack of dawn to run so I get a few minutes of Coy-free time with her. Those moments are quickly becoming the best part of my day. I look forward to them even more than the times I fantasize about stripping her down to nothing in the back yard, laying her out on one of the lounge chairs and eating her out until she squeezes my head with her thighs and chants my name. Not that I won’t stop dreaming up moments like that, but as much as I want to trace every inch of her body with my tongue, I’m more focused on getting to know hermind.
And yes, that makes me a total loser. I know it and I don’t even care, which only shows how twisted up this woman has me. Only it’s not her fault. She has no fucking clue how desirable she is. Or how I feel, for that matter. She’s more concerned aboutCoy.
Bitter much? Yeah, that’s a fun pill to swallow day in and day out. Tonightespecially.
“We done yet? You might not have a social life, but I do. At least I did a few months ago.” Austin groans, leaning back into the leather swivel chair. We’ve been in the basement for the past few hours going over logistics for our upcoming tour. Not by choice, but by Bedo’s ridiculous standard of workethic.
“I don’t like to agree with him, but Aust has a point. We’ve worked through dinner every night this week. We need a few hours off.” Trent stands from the table and stretches his armsoverhead.
Bedo’s lips pinch together with a scowl and he gathers the loose papers from on top of the conference style table before shoving them into his briefcase. “Which you will get. Saturday and Sunday. Within the limits we’ve alreadydiscussed.”
“Bullshit!” Austin yells. “No leaving the house?Again!”
“Unless it’s to the emergency room? No. The tour kicks off in three weeks. You can party to your menacing heart’s desire once we’re on theroad.”
“Bullshit. That’s not gonna happen and you know it. This is fucking bullshit! Do you know how hard it is to get laid when you can’t leave the house?” Austin stands up and glares at Bedo.Oh, shit.Homeboy ispissed.
“It’s actually pretty easy for me,” Coy jokes. “Considering my girl is always ready and waiting.” He laughs, but it’s a poor attempt to break the tension. His words only rile me up. Iknowhe’s with Jess, but I don’t want to think about the two of them togetherintimately.
“What gives, Bedo? We’ve done our time. Iz isn’t even in the fucking band. When are we off house arrest?” I act as offended as Austin, though I don’t have a real need to leave the house. Not when the woman who occupies all my spare headspace ishere.
“Look.” Bedo stands from the table and fiddles with the gold band of his watch. “I wasn’t gonna say anything, because the deal isn’t in ink, but I have a sponsorship opportunity. Big. Fucking colossal. If we get it, it’s enough for all of you to retire and live like kings without working another day in yourlives.”
I glance around at my bandmates. Coy’s eyes are as wide as if he’d won the lotto, which I guess he has. Trent straightens his spine but his expression is full of the same skepticism I feel in mygut.
Austin’s the one to speak up. “Okay, so what? You have some top secret deal that may or may not happen, and in the meantime we what? Get tucked into bed bynine?”
“Yep.” Bedo meets his glare. “I’m asking you to trust me on thisone.”
“Kinda like I’m asking you to trust I won’t go out and get high off my ass tonight?”Touché. One pointAustin.
“If you need to get laid, call a fucking hooker. Call a fuck buddy. Hell, order yourself a sex doll. I don’t care. ’Cause honestly, Austin, this shouldn’t be such a big fucking deal. I’ve got thousands of IPs in my inbox this very second from bands all wishing they could be so lucky as to live rent free and do what they love for aliving.”
“I’m not paying for sex,” Austin grumbles. “And this isn’t just about getting laid. I need to get out ofhere.”
Bedo exhales with exaggeration, his gaze resting on each of us a long moment before settling back on Austin. “I might—I said might—know of a party on Sunset tomorrow. Industry professionals only. You’d have to promise tobehave.”
Austin bounces on the balls of his feet and smiles wide. “You can have my first-born child if Idon’t.”
Bedo rolls his eyes. “The last thing I need is a child. How about I cut off your balls if youdon’t.”
Austin laughs but Bedo’s hard glare chases all humor from hisface.
“Think I’m kidding? Try me.”One point, Bedo. Shaking his head and grabbing his briefcase off the table, he turns and heads up the stairs. “I’ll send a car tomorrow at eight. Until then, don’t make me regretit.”
“We’ll be angels!” Trent calls up and we all snicker, catching a few muttered cuss words from Bedo as he disappears up thestairs.
