Page 85 of Big Island Summer
“Basically that Adam’s death was harder on you than Laurel’s was on me.”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have–”
“Just a minute. Let me say what I’m trying to. I was pissed, but you weren’t exactly wrong. I mean, I was gutted.” His voice trembled. “I loved my wife.”
“I know you did,” she said quietly.
“But you weren’t wrong. Adam was, well, he was basically perfect. And Laurel… I’d been grieving her for years. Losing her a little bit at a time. Even before she overdosed, she was struggling. We were struggling. I tried to convince myself that things could be good again, tried to convince her… but the woman I fell in love with, she disappeared years ago.”
Emma put a hand on his arm. “I know.”
“I never would have gone looking for somebody so soon. I never would have gone out and started dating the minute I moved here. But Fern just… she caught me by surprise. She’s incredible, Em.”
She hugged him tight, then let him go.
“I’m happy for you, Ethan. Really.”
“I’ve never met anyone like her.”
“Have you told her that?”
Twin lines of concern appeared between his eyebrows. “Not in those words.”
Emma smiled up at him. “Maybe you should.”
24
Fern
“Hey Fern.” Ethan walked around the corner half a second after her last student left.
“Hi.” She clutched a pile of yoga pillows to her chest and grinned like a fool.
“You’re done with work for the day, yeah?”
“Yep, that was my last class.”
“Come upstairs when you can, would you? I want to talk to you, but I don’t want to leave Theo too long.”
Her heart stuttered and sank. “Of course.”
“Okay, thanks.” His grin was nervous as he took a couple of steps backwards. Then he turned and disappeared around the corner.
A quiet sense of dread settled into her stomach.
She took calming breaths as she cleaned up, deep breaths through her nose, but it didn’t stop her thoughts from skittering.
Worries buzzed around her head like mosquitos:
He was going to tell her that he needed space.
It was all too much too soon.
He regretted getting involved with his landlady.
He regretted the kiss. Kisses.
They hadn’t meant to him what they did to her. Not even close.
