Page 98 of Knot All is Crystal
But I don’t feel that right now.
I think I’m seeing a man who can love someone who is broken, and hoping he has room in his heart for two.
“Mav?”
Speak of the fucking Beta.
I jerk to standing and bark, “What?”
“I just wanted to check on you.” His voice is extremely level. Almost forced. “I heard a loud thunk.”
“Oh, yeah, I just dropped myself into the tub. You know how it is.”
“I guess? You good, though?”
I peel the curtain back a little, poking my head around to look at him.
He looks worried. Like, honestly, actually concerned. His mouth is drawn tight under his red beard, and his green eyes seem to be looking everywhere at me at once, even though he can’t see much of anything. Tension bleeds from his body as he sees that I’m whole.
“Can we talk?” I say before I can rethink it.
He nods, leaning against the wall. “What’s up?”
THIRTY-SIX
“Actually, can you get Crystal?”Maverick asks as he closes the curtain. I watch his shadow slip down to the base of the tub.
I stick my head into the living room, where Emmanuel and Crystal are cuddled up on the couch, whispering to one another. They’re adorable, cuddled in each other’s arms, and I feel bad about interrupting them.
But when I tell her that Maverick asked for us, she untangles herself from Emmanuel and follows me into the bathroom.
“We’re here,” I call out, even though I’m sure he heard us come in. “What’s up, Mav?”
His sigh is loud enough that I hear it over the water. Crys moves and sits on the closed lid of the toilet. “You can tell us anything, Alpha,” she says quietly.
“I know, but I don’t know, you know?”
“That’s a lot of knows, but I’m going to throw in my own. No, I have no idea what you’re saying,” I joke.
“Look, this is all new, and none of us know what is going on, and we’re all learning things, right? And like there is no one way for a pack to be, and we’re all trying to figure it out while in the middle of an actual shit show. And now I’m going to add to the shit show, and honestly, I feel like an asshole for doing this because this so isn’t the time, and we have bigger fish to fry and mob bosses to evade, and our Omega is hurt, and so I don’t want to seem like I am downplaying that or even ignoring it but something came up, and I can’t keep things in, you know? It’s not something I do. I don’t keep secrets. My parents always said it’s okay to keep some secrets, but I don’t like to, okay?”
He sounds panicked, and I wish I could hold his hand or steady him on the shoulder or something. We sit in silence, and it stretches between us, but I know there is nothing I can say right now. I just have to wait until he gets this out.
When he finally speaks, it’s not what I expected.
“I think I have a crush on Gage.”
My heart kind of stutters in my chest, and Crystal gasps softly. I can’t bring myself to look at her. I don’t know what response I want from her, and I worry that seeing one on her face will make me crave the other.
“You think?” My voice sounds strangled.
“I mean, I know I do. I was saying that to give myself an out, and make it less intense or whatever, but I definitely do. But it’s weird because I’m not into guys. Well, I wasn’t, I guess. I’m definitely into you, which is wild. I’ve never been into a guy before, but you’re different, and I don’t know why. All I know is that when I see you with Crystal, I want to be a part of that. I want you to look at me like you look at her.”
The feeling that stirs within me is indescribable. It’s nothing I’ve ever felt before, and I’m unsure if I will ever feel it again.
I’m not into guys, either.
But I cannot deny that Maverick has made me feel… special. Comfortable.
