Page 31 of A Very Crumbleton Christmas
Doing as he was told, Jack passed her the end of his cracker and watched in amusement as she gave it a good shake, sending something rattling onto his plate.
‘There. Told you!’ she crowed in triumph.
Sure enough, there was a large, rather ugly yellow plastic ring sitting right in the middle of his plate… complete with a sparkly plastic diamond.
‘Wow, now that’s expensive!’ said Jack with a grin as he picked it up with exaggerated reverence. ‘It’s way too small to fit me – hold out your hand!’
Caroline raised an eyebrow and then extended her left hand, wiggling her fingers at him.
‘Perfect fit,’ he said, nestling it straight onto her wedding ring finger.
‘Oh. Blimey!’ said Caroline with a laugh of pure surprise.
Jack stared at her for a long moment. He had two choices… he could get all idiotic and tongue-tied, or let his inner actor take over.
‘I’ve been planning to make an honest woman of you for the longest time,’ he said, his voice low and booming as he smacked himself hard on the chest.
Caroline rolled her eyes, but he wasn’t about to stop now.
‘The time is finally right. I hope you’ll take me, flaws and all. I know you deserve better, Imelda Gertrude Caroline the Great –but I hope you’ll have me! We can make it work… I know we can. It’ll take work… and at least eight or nine children!’
‘Eight or nine?!’ snorted Caroline, her shoulders shaking with giggles.
‘You’re spoiling the scene!’ hissed Jack from behind his hand.
‘Fine!’She sighed and cleared her throat. ‘Jack Plonkerus Jones the third…’
They both winced as her accent fell somewhere between Texas and the Welsh Valleys.
‘I do declare… I don’t know what my daddy will say… nor my ten ex-husbands… but… but… I…’ Caroline’s words dissolved as her giggles took over.
Jack swiped at his eyes and took a swig of his wine. Well, she might not have given him an answer to his imaginary proposal, but it didn’t look like he was about to get that ring back in a hurry!
‘I think we’d better eat something,’ said Jack once they’d both had the chance to calm down a bit. ‘Maybe it’ll help that awful accent of yours!’
‘Cheeky blighter,’ said Caroline, with a loud huff. ‘But yes please – pass me the Pringles?’
‘First things first,’ said Jack, handing her a paper napkin.
‘Snowmen napkins, Jack?’ she laughed. ‘Really?’
‘I’m sorry I didn’t have my best linens ready,’ he said with a broad grin. ‘I didn’t expect to have a special guest.’
‘I guess I’ll let you off then,’ said Caroline, shooting him a wink. ‘Besides, I quite like your festive side.’
‘As long as it doesn’t get out,’ said Jack. ‘I do have a reputation to uphold, you know!’
‘Don’t worry,’ said Caroline, her voice suddenly serious. ‘It won’t.’
Jack shot her a look and then smiled. He didn’t know why – but he trusted her completely. Maybe it was something to dowith the fact that she’d already publicly torn him to shreds on multiple occasions. He had no doubt that she’d happily tell him to his face if she was angling for a story while she was there.
‘Alrighty then,’ said Jack, giving himself a little shake as he did his best to tear his eyes away from two little drops of water as they made their way slowly down the curve of her neck. ‘If you think I’m going to let my guest dine on Pringles alone, then you have another thing coming!’
‘Where do you want me to start then?’ said Caroline.
‘Anywhere!’ said Jack.
‘I’ll have the pink Pringles then, please,’ said Caroline with a grin.
