Page 17 of Crying Shame
I’d forgotten how nice he was.
He didn’t seem to mind that I was getting his shirt wet. I rocked against him and wished I was stronger. Once my crying subsided, I swiped at my tears and stood. “Tears don’t solve problems.”
He met my gaze, though my vision was still glassy. “That’s hard. Look, after I broke up with you, I regretted it. I asked your parents what happened to you. I looked around for you. I wanted to make it right, but you were gone.”
I shrugged. He’d gone to medical school and now owned a medical company. He’d done exactly what he’d said he was going to do.
“I had to find a job that would pay the bills as I was determined to have my baby,” I said.
He took my hand. “I've spent every day for the past eight years wondering where you were. A few weeks ago, I decided before my… our next birthdays, I needed to find you. It’s why I went to your place.”
Maybe somehow the universe had delivered a message to him as Sam and I had slept in my car that we needed help. My eyes were watery. I jumped back so he wouldn't get a repeat showing of my weakness. “I need a few minutes.”
I dashed to the nearest restroom. My heart thumped as he called, “Take your time.”
Once I closed the door behind me, I rocked back and forth and stared at myself in the mirror.
He was so fucking nice. I wished he’d not found me sneaking food in the kitchen. Then maybe I wouldn't feel so uneasy around him.
Footsteps sounded on the stairs. I took a few deep breaths. There was no way I could let my son see me like this. I swallowed, washed my face so there was no sign of tears, and quietly opened the door.
I heard Sam ask Elon, “Dad, have you seen Mom?”
My ears buzzed, and I held my hand to my chest. Losing Sam had already begun.
Elon said, “She’s had a hard day. Do you want anything?”
“Popcorn, though I’m actually hungry for more,” Sam said. I peeked into the room to see Elon writing out a text and sending it. He put his phone on the table and took the seat next to Sam.
“Can I ask you a question?” Sam asked.
"Sure." Elon nodded. “What’s going on?”
“Mom’s been through a lot. Can you marry her?”
I covered my mouth so no one heard me gasp. Sam had never done anything this embarrassing before. His school counselor had mentioned something to me about not letting him live entirely in a fantasy world, but maybe he couldn't help it. Maybe it was genetic.
Elon said, “I don’t think she’d want that.”
Nice way of ducking that question. Elon was the one who literally could have any partner he chose.
Sam said, “She’ll say yes, if you ask. I’ll make sure of it.”
I rocked on my feet. It was time to end the conversation. I rattled the door knob of the bathroom, then skipped into the room like I was excited and happy.
Sam immediately hugged me.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
The doorbell rang. Elon and Sam both headed toward the door like they were expecting someone. I tensed and hugged myself as I wasn’t sure what I'd missed. They returned, Sam with flowers and Elon with pizza.
My son walked over and handed me the bouquet. “Dad got us pizza and you flowers.”
I'd been gone for two minutes or less, although Elon had probably texted his staff earlier to have the pizza and flowers delivered. We needed to speak about that once we were alone.
Elon nodded. There was a twinkle in his eyes. “Those are for you.”
Flowers were something a man got a woman when they were dating, and we weren’t dating. But I sniffed the roses, as this was the first time a man had bought them for me. I knew he intended the flowers as a peace offering. “Thank you, Elon… thank you for everything.”
