Page 38 of Eat Your Heart Out
She closed each row of shelves in the closet. When I realized there were more cabinets, I helped.
A moment later, she clapped her hands. “And we’re done. Thank you for your help.”
I wrung my hands. “What are you going to do now?”
She shrugged. “Everything is locked down, so I’ll be in my room reading unless the captain calls for me.”
Alone.My heart thumped. I walked out and headed downstairs. It had started to rain. Goose bumps rose on my arms, and my breathing became more shallow. Still, I pressed on, heading back to my room.
When I made it to my floor, my eyes widened as I saw Gerard. I rushed to him and grabbed his arm. I needed to be with him.
“There you are. Ready to go eat dinner?” he asked.
My stomach was doing flips. I swallowed hard. “You can eat?”
He walked with me back to the stairs. “Always. Tonight is pizza since we wanted something easy for the crew.”
My entire body was tense as we walked upstairs.
“Sounds delicious and bad for you. I thought you kept it healthy,” I said.
“I like all foods that are cooked well.”
We kept indoors and took the seats that were bolted down.
“I can go with the flow,” I said.
Zheng brought us an entire pizza along with plastic plates and a bottle of wine. I blinked with astonishment. Everyone acted like the storm was normal.
My spine grew cold, but I waited until we were alone to say anything. “You’re all so nonchalant with your lives. I’m scared of drowning. You have a glass floor built into the bottom to watch fish.”
“This is a Nord. I could have opted for a submarine option if I’d wanted, but it’s made with the best technology, and there are layers of metal.” He cut the pizza and placed a slice with olives, mushrooms, and spinach on my plate.
When I glanced at his plate, his slice had pineapple. I winced. Pineapple on pizza always sounded like froufrou nonsense to me, though to be fair, I’d not tried it.
“We’ll be fine, and if there is an issue, I have lifeboats and the helicopter,” he said. “I opted out of the submarine option, as it slowed down normal speeds.”
“Okay.”
Heat from the shame of judging him rushed into my face. I shouldn’t. Gerard was into health, but he was sweet, and he had so many amazing qualities, like how he loved his family, how he treated everyone kindly. His brothers counted him as a friend, and honestly, he was great to me.
I lifted my chin and refused to think badly about him again. However, I let out a sigh. “Except you said it wasn’t coming. Now it’s heading for us, and part of me wonders if this is my fate that I can’t escape.”
He took my hand and met my gaze. “Are you talking about your car accident?”
Both. My mother’s death and how she threw herself over me replayed in my head, and I didn’t want to die at sea. Honestly, I’d never thought about it before, but I wasn’t thinking straight as we lightly bounced up and down. “Yeah. Look, maybe I should just go to my room.”
He squeezed my palm. “You have nothing to fear with me.” He let me go.
I nodded and tried to eat. Surprisingly, I finished my slice. “I get that. It’s just—”
“That you want to leave now,” he finished for me.
My heart thundered. Maybe he wanted me to go. “I never said that.”
He shrugged. “We went too fast, and I shouldn’t have—”
“Yes, you should have.” He was talking about almost having sex. I closed my eyes and whispered, “I can’t think straight near you.”
