Page 76 of The Woodcarver's Model
Now, sitting by the fire, Mitch thought about the choices he’d made throughout his life. So many were self-destructive. He had often wondered why he kept sabotaging himself. Maybe it was because he didn’t deserve to be happy and when things seemed to be heading that way, he made sure it didn’t happen. But now things started to come into focus. Now he had begun to remember. It was Kevin.
He remembered Sarah telling him that, as hard as it was to do, he had to stop blaming himself for things that were not in his control. He began to realise that much of what had happened to him was not his fault.
Mitch had been afraid to make the wrong decisions. He had been conditioned that way through years of “You’re not going to wear that again? It makes you look fat,” and “You’re not going to that school, are you? I thought you were smarter than that.” Mitch soon found it easier to let Kevin make the choices for him than do it himself, even though he was convinced they were the wrong ones. He had convinced himself that Kevin knew best.
Kevin had long since lost control over his own life, so he took control of his brother’s.
Mitch thought about how he had chosen to believe Kevin over Rob when it came to the murder. If he’d been wrong in believing Kevin about Africa, could he also have let his brother’s grudge against Rob fuel his own fears of losing him to Eric? Had Rob ever shown Mitch anything but love and support since he’d come into his life again? And the plans to develop Admiral’s Peak—had Rob done anything to support it or was that idea another self-destructive move on his own part, fed by his brother?
Maybe the article Rob had written was what he claimed it to be—then Mitch remembered his laptop.
He ran into his bedroom and opened up his computer. If the file was still there, where would Rob have saved it? There, on the desktop—‘Saving Marsh Island’.
He sat on the edge of his bed and read.
The article took a little more than a half an hour to read. Mitch wiped the tears from his eyes as he read the final lines over again.
“If we don’t stand up for what we believe in, if we put profit ahead of what is truly precious to us, then we really are nothing more than parasites that kill their hosts.”
Rob had intended to make the case to save the island from development, just as he’d said. And Mitch hadn’t trusted him. Mitch had so intensely wanted to believe that he’d been betrayed because he didn’t think he deserved to be happy.
* * * *
Rob lay beside him. His eyes were closed. Though he slept, his mouth held a gentle smile. He was an angel at peace with his world. Rob’s muscular chest rose and fell with each breath. The sheet lay draped across his body, covering his hips. Mitch could clearly make out the outline of his cock. Mitch’s heart pounded. He felt the heat of his own body as he anticipated what would come next. A small trickle of sweat traced its way from his neck, down past his nipples. His armpits dripped. Mitch’s penis ached. If it was any more engorged, it would split. Precum flowed from its tip, soaking the sheet. He reached down, pulling the sheet to uncover Rob’s erection—
His dream was interrupted by the ringing phone. At first, Mitch was disoriented. When he realised what it was, he wanted to ignore the phone in case it was Kevin calling. Mitch knew he wouldn’t give up that easily, but if it were Maggie, and he didn’t answer, she would be over here within the hour.
“Hello?”
“Hi there. Is this Mitch?” the woman said.
“Yes.”
“I’m sorry to call you so early in the morning.”
“No problem. It’s…ten o’clock,” Mitch replied.
“Ach, my internal clock is off. Travel and time zones fuck me up every time. How are you?”
“Who is this?”
“It’s Karen.”
“Karen?” Mitch drew a blank at the name. “I think you’ve got the wrong number.”
“I’m Rob’s friend.”
“Oh…Rob’s…not here.”
“I know. That’s what I’m trying to tell you,” Karen said.
“How did you find me?” Mitch was confused.
“Rob called me a while ago, so you were in my call log. He told me to delete it but… Well, I guess it’s a good thing I don’t always do what he asks.”
“Oh.” Mitch paused. “Look, I’m not sure if Rob’s told you—”
Karen pushed on. “I know how much he cares about you and I just want to make sure you’re okay.”
