Page 134 of Salute, To Bravery
I couldn’t believe it. Ophelia was slowly going down the drain, and all I could do was watch and pray, and I didn’t even do lots of praying. I couldn’t just sit here and watch her drown.
“Hey,” a familiar voice said.
I looked up; it was Sarah, and her big bump wasn’t there anymore.
“Hey.” I got up immediately, almost ripping out my headphones in the process. “How are you? How’s the baby?”
“One question at a time,” she said as she sat. “I’m tired, and the baby is doing great. Despite my worries, the doctors say that she is fine. All she does is cry,” she said.
“No joke. Kids are exhausting.”
“You don’t know exhaustion until you have a baby.” She laughed. “How are you and Ophelia doing?”
I paused in my tracks. Responding was inevitable. If I stayed silent, maybe she would forget that she asked. I didn’t know how to respond. Our relationship was the best I could have hoped for, but she was distant. Everything was perfect except for that.
“Did you guys break up?” she asked cautiously, keeping eye contact with me.
I never thought eye contact could be scary until now. It felt like she could see into me. It felt like she could see all my emotions and thoughts.
“No,” I said plainly, scared to give any other details.
“Then why are you acting weird?” she asked, putting her head in her hand. “What happened, Violet?”
“Ophelia has been acting weird,” I said, finally giving in. I shouldn’t be talking to someone else about the problem; I should be talking to Ophelia about it. I just don’t know how to. “She’s been distant ever since she got back from Japan. I can’t help but think it’smyfault.”
“First of all, someone else’s actions do not reflect on your personality, it reflects on theirs. Have you ever thought that something happened in Japan?”
“Yes but—”
“No, don’t gaslight yourself. Don’t undermine yourself. Something probably happened in Japan, and she just doesn’t want to admit it because she’s an avoidant.”
“So am I, in all honesty.”
“I can tell.” She laughed. “But two avoiders create a problem. You both need to get over your fears and just approach the situation. Sweeping it under the rug isn’t going to do anything. Go talk to her.” She took a sip of her coffee. “You need to talk with her before it becomes a bigger issue.”
“Okay.” I started to pack my things, grabbed my car keys out of the bag, and rushed out the door.
“You forgot your drink,” I heard Sarah yell.
I ran back inside, grabbed my cup, ran back outside, and started my car. After about another fifteen minutes of driving, I finally arrived at Ophelia’s.
Nerves were in my stomach. My hands were slightly shaking. I shouldn’t have been nervous, I knew that; I was talking to my partner, not a stranger. Yet, my gut was telling me I was gonnafind out something that I wasn’t going to be happy about. Either way, I knew I would walk out of this conversation with my heart broken. I didn’t know how, but I knew.
I knocked on the door and waited patiently.
I heard the gears unlock, and the anxiety heightened to one-thousand.
“Yes,” she said. “Oh, hey.” She finally looked out of the door. “What are you doing here?”
“I’m here to talk with you.”
Her face went blank; she opened the door wider.
“Thank you.” My voice was shaky.
I walked into her messy living room; it looked as if she hadn’t done dishes or cleaned in at least three months, since she’d returned. It even smelled.
“Sorry about the mess,” she said shyly.
