Page 93 of Salute, To Bravery
Then I pull out my phone and send a quick text to Rei. Just three words:
Rei: I fucked up.
A short time later, my phone buzzes. She’s calling.
I answer with my Bluetooth, already rolling toward the main building for a full day of appointments and new command meetings.
Her voice explodes in my ear: “What the actual fuck did you do?”
I sigh. “Hi, Rei. I’m good, thanks for asking. How are you?”
“Craig.”
“I had a nightmare,” I say. “A bad one. I thought I was back over there. Fighting. I didn’t know where I was. She tried to wake me and… I went after her. Full-on. Grabbed her by the throat before I snapped out of it.”
There’s a pause.
“Jesus,” she mutters. “Did you hurt her?”
“She got away. Fought back. She’s tough—God, she’s tough.” I swallow hard. “But I saw the fear in her eyes. She didn’t even look at me like I was me anymore.”
“Because you scared the hell out of her, Craig. And yeah, that’s not on her—but you’ve got to understand she’s not just scared for you now. She’s potentially scaredofyou.”
“I know,” I whisper. “I know. I’m scared too.”
“You don’t get to stay scared,” Rei snaps. “You fight. That’s what you do. You don’t curl up in guilt and leave her wondering what the hell’s going on. You go back. You talk to her. You tell her the truth. Maybe not the classified crap, but thetruth, Craig. What you felt. What you saw. Why you reacted the way you did.”
“She’ll leave me.”
“She might,” she says bluntly. “But she won’t stay if you disappear on her. And if youloveher—really love her—you owe her more than silence.”
I press my palm to my forehead, trying to fight off the rising burn behind my eyes.
“I thought I was supposed to be the big brother.”
“Nope, I just let you think you’re in charge.”
“She’s everything, Rei.”
“Then prove it. Don’t make her beg to understand. You’re not the only one hurting.”
The line is quiet for a beat. Then, softer: “I love you, bro. But if you hurt her again byavoidingher, I’ll drive out there and finish what your wife started.”
I actually laugh, a little breathless and broken. “I hear you.”
“Good. Now get your ass in gear. Talk to her. Today.”
She hangs up.
I sit there, the weight of her words pressing in on me like armor I’m not sure I can carry—but know I need to.
I wheel forward toward my next appointment, but all I can think about is how to get back to my wife… before it’s too late.
Jane
I sit up in bed, the soft blue light of the TV flickering across the room, casting faint shadows on the walls. Some mindless show plays in the background, noise for the sake of not sittingin silence. My thoughts have been racing since sunrise, looping back to this morning like a reel stuck on the worst frame.
The door creaks open.
