Page 13 of A Brush with Love
“I don’t know. It’s complicated, I guess,” she said with a nervous laugh. “There was a long period while I was growing up where I questioned and doubted a lot of the faith aspects, but even through all that, I felt a part of the community. Judaism has all these layers outside of faith that makes it really incredible—the food, culture, history—it always made me feel like I had a home to turn to. A safety net of people that would welcome me in.” She emphasized this by gesturing toward Martin, who was now bickering with a new customer, and she and Dan shared an amused look.
“As I came to terms with my own roadblocks with faith,” she continued, “being Jewish became an important part of my identity, I think. I mean, obviously, no group of people is perfect, but I’m privileged enough to feel I belong to something greater than myself.”
Dan looked at her as though he saw something more than just Harper sitting in front of him, and it created a shaky feeling in her stomach. She shifted in her seat.
“What about you? Are you religious?” she asked, breaking the silence.
The intensity of his stare broke, and he laughed.
“This got pretty existential, huh? I’ll take the blame for that. Not your normal get-to-know-you talk.”
“No, it’s not.” She laughed back, feeling some tension drop from her shoulders. “But sharing is caring, so it’s your turn.” She wasn’t going to let him get a piece without giving one in return.
He chewed on a bite of food, a faraway look in his eyes. “Not really. It wasn’t something my family ever talked about. My dad was Irish Catholic, and my mom is Muslim, though she learned pretty early on after immigrating here how uncomfortable it made people to hear that. She doesn’t talk about her experiences much withme, and I don’t know that she was ever particularly devout, but I do think she may have slowly lost part of her connection to it.”
“I’m sorry,” Harper said. “That probably sounds like the world’s greatest platitude, but I am. No one should have to lose a piece of themselves to make others comfortable.”
Dan gave her a soft smile. “Thank you. I agree.” He took a sip of his drink. “But yeah, my dad was adamant about church at Christmas and Easter, but all religion was pretty much ignored the rest of the year.”
He wiped his hands on a napkin. “I got the sense growing up that they couldn’t agree on how to show me both, so they settled on showing me neither. Or, more likely, my dad decided that’s how it would be,” he said with a small frown down at the table. “He dictated a lot like that.”
After a moment, he turned those gorgeous green eyes to her, sweet and unguarded. “To answer your question in the most roundabout way possible: No, I’m not religious. But I like to think I believe in something. I just don’t know what that is yet.”
They stared at each other for a few heavy moments. He was an open book, and Harper wanted to devour every page. She’d never felt this overwhelming need to learn someone like she wanted to learn Dan.
“So, what do you like to do for fun?” Dan asked, breaking the silence and returning to his food.
She stared at him in disbelief. “Really?Thatquestion? That has to be the worst question of all time.”
He tilted his head with a confused look. “Why? It’s a bit more neutral than religion, don’t you think?”
“It makes me forget every time I’ve had fun. Ever. It’s like asking someone their favorite movie. The second that’s asked, it’s like you’ve never seen a movie in your life.”
He gave her a bemused glance. “My favorite movie isDie Hard.”
She rolled her eyes. “You and every other dude.”
He let out a loud laugh, and it warmed something in Harper’s chest.
“Am I not original enough for you, Horowitz? What’s yours? It better be super obscure and artsy.”
“I. Don’t. Know,” she growled. “Questions like that make my brain dissolve.”
“What about a favorite TV show?”
She stared at him blankly. “This is emotional guerrilla warfare.”
“Color? You have to have a favorite color.” He was enjoying this.
Harper glared at him for a long moment before answering. “Purple.”
“Okay, we’re getting somewhere. It’s like I really know you now.”
“Yup, all my secrets.”
“Maybe not all of them, but I’m getting close.”
Their eyes met as they smiled. Dan looked at her with a light tenderness that set off alarm bells in her mind. This was feeling like a date. Which it absolutely wasn’t.
