Page 118 of Summer Breakdown
“What time is it?” she asks, as he shuffles over. Thankfully, she brought a couch that was Ezra-sized, though she hates the fact that she had to because she knew he’d stay over if she needed him, even if she never said the words out loud. Ezra is the one constant in Frankie’s life. She’s never known a single day without him. He loves her; she knows that. Why is it so hard to believe?
“Like, five in the morning.”
“Ugh,” she replies. A shower is calling her name. She wants to wash the sleep off and maybe go and speak to Jasmine. Wait—she wants to shower?
“It’s been ten days,” he says.
No.
“What?”
He sits next to her. “You’ve been in and out for ten days.” Frankie looks at her clothes. They’re all different—they clash.
“You changed yourself,” he says. “You told me I have no fashion sense.”
Frankie screws up her face. She’s a cunt when she’s having an episode. God, what did she say? Where’s her phone? Where is Jasmine?
“You know you’re my soulmate, right?” Ezra asks. Frankie frowns as she looks up at him. People think he’s angry or grumpy or rude, and they’re right—he is all of those things—but he’s soft too. He’s kind. He’s the best person she knows.
“Cameron is the love of my life,” he whispers. “I hope I’m hers. But you’re my soulmate. I’d love you for the rest of my life, even if you weren’t here. But I’ll forgive you if you want to swap me for Jasmine.”
Her face falls. “Is she okay?”
“She’s okay.”
Frankie blinks the sleep out of her eyes. “I want to be here.” Her eyes widen as Ezra smiles. “I want to be here.”
He blows out a breath, wiping at his face. She hurts him all the time, and she wishes she never did. She moves until her back is against the wall. Ezra moves his legs in front of him, and she copies his position. They used to do this as children. Frankie would freak out before they knew what was wrong, and he’d find her in the wardrobe and sit with her.
“We got the old pills back?”
He nods, something pulling at his jaw that she can’t figure out. “Yeah.”
“Oh,” she replies. “That’s good.”
Ezra smiles brightly. “It is good.”
The worries never end. “Is—how is—have you heard from Jasmine?”
Ezra smiles. “She misses you.”
The tears fall easily. God, she’s fucked it up with her.
“I love her so much,” she whispers. Ezra pulls her closer, his arm around her shoulder.
“Yeah,” Ezra responds, with a light laugh. “I know. Everyone knows you’re in love with her. Everyone has known you’ve been in love with her since the day she turned up at training and you changed everything so she could take part and then spoke all of about two words to her.”
“Shh,” she replies. Ezra leans away for a moment, and she knows he’s going to get the pills again. That he knows her well enough to know when to try. She wishes she made things easier for him.
“Jasmine doesn’t know that,” he says. “You have to tell her, show her. It’s not fair to expect her to figure it out for herself.”
Frankie shakes her head. “I don’t deserve her anymore.”
“What about what Jasmine deserves?”
Frankie sniffs. “God, she was so hurt. She didn’t want me to leave, and I left anyway. The only thing I had to dowas love her, and it’s the easiest thing in the world. It’s so simple, and it makes my entire life feel like it’s worth something. If I lost the club, if I lost this house, it wouldn’t matter. At some point in my life, Jasmine was in love with me. She let me love her. And I’ve ruined it.”
“Frankie, you deserve everything you want.”
