Page 25 of Summer Breakdown
So, it’s rude that Jasmine’s heart thumps with the idea of seeing her today. She won’t. Her and Lani’s visit was planned to avoid seeing Frankie. Jasmine finally texted Mali back, apologised for her departure and blamed it on cramps, and asked if they could tour the grounds before practice started. Ezra was at the open day and said Lani could train, and she’d jumped at the idea. Jasmine’s not sure she cares for rugby that much, but she likes being with Marcel, and after a fifteen-minute conversation where he said all of three words, she’s decided Ezra is her best friend.
Jasmine knows Mali is the only one in the office today, but annoyingly, somewhere she tries not to look, she hopes she can glare at Frankie from across the field anyway.
It’s barely been six days since the open day, but Frankie has taken up real estate in Jasmine’s dreams. She wants to hate her, but every time she tries, something happens. It’s like divine intervention but to piss her off. Jasmine will scowl at the way Frankie didn’t have the decency to text her, but then the way she ran to wash her hands the moment she knew it was Kehlani shoves its way in. Jasmine will try and remember the way she felt when Frankie left, and then the way she crosses her fingers lands in her frontal lobe. She wants to hate her, but then she researched what it means to be bipolar, and she just—it sounds so fucking tiring.
Jasmine wants to push Lani into the office and pretend she’s not thinking about the way Frankie smiled at the stars. Is that so hard? She wants to be so uninterested in her existence that she barely looks at her. But her laugh invades her thoughts as she tries to pretend she was looking at the noticeboard, where the events Frankie arranged were forced into her eyeline. It’s difficult to dislike someone who hosts a rugby match for the elderly and serves tea and biscuits, but Jasmine will try her best.
Frankie’s smile clings to every thought Jasmine has, and she hasn’t even seen her face in days.
Marcel (the light of Jasmine’s life and her new sworn enemy) followed Frankie on Jasmine’s Instagram. (He doesn’t have a fancy phone because he only just turned fourteen, and she’s terrified of him being online. He doesn’t push for one, but she has been thinking about it.) If he hadn’t done that, Frankie wouldn’t have requested to follow her back. Jasmine stared at the notification for hours before she finally accepted it, and that’s only because she took a hot photo and, like a loser, she wanted to rub it in Frankie’s face.
Now, every time Jasmine posts a story (Lani is cute in summer, and sometimes Marcel doesn’t groan if she pullsher phone out) Frankie reacts to it. Sometimes, she replies. Jasmine was perfectly content to ignore her, but Frankie reacts with a laughing sideways emoji, like a grandma, and she tells Jasmine the cringeworthy photos of sunsets are pretty, and she makes it seem like Jasmine is interesting just by doing nothing. She’snice. And she’s ruining Jasmine’s life.
Fool her once, shame on her, et cetera, but Jasmine is halfway to being fooled again. The night Jasmine met her, Frankie made it seem like Jasmine was interesting and she just wanted to fuck her. Jasmine doesn’t know what Frankie wants now. But, on her hundredth replay of the night, she remembers Frankie didn’t ask her anything. She barely spoke to her. But now Frankie’s got questions left and right because she found out Jasmine played rugby for five minutes about seven years ago.NowFrankie finds her interesting. Now that she’s not just a mum.
Jasmine hates how she fell for it. There’s a fine line between flirting and cruelty. Frankie didn’t need to say she wanted to go out with her. She didn’t need to saynext time.She didn’t need to do anything other than get her tongue wet. Frankie must think she’s an idiot. Cam was clear, and Jasmine asked her out anyway.
So, no, Jasmine’s chest doesn’t sink when she sees it’s just Mali in the office. Jasmine likes Mali.
“Hey, girl!” Mali says, then her eyes widen. “Oh my God, hi!”
Lani smiles. “Hi.”
“I’m Mali,” she says, bending down. “It’s so nice to meet you.”
Mali is easy to be around. She’s stupidly kind and jumped back into conversation with Jasmine easily, even though Jasmine had ignored her for the better part of a week. Maybe she’s no better than Frankie.
“You’re so pretty,” Mali says, and Lani bends forwards with a smile. Mali’s right.She is.
“Thank you,” Lani replies. She takes her hat off. “Mama did my braids this morning. I’m Kehlani.”
“Wow,” Mali replies. “Maybe I need my hair braided.”
“Mama said you have other colour hair too,” Lani says, leaning forwards like she does when the conversation is important. Jasmine may be ignored for the next hour, but it’s so sweet she doesn’t mind.
“So many! Come over with your mum for a cuppa and I’ll show you.”
Lani smiles, her feet touching at the toes. “And maybe… could I try one?”
Mali gasps with a smile. “Of course!”
Jasmine reads some of the pamphlets while they talk. The one for the accounting position is still there, but she’s not trying to be around Frankie any more than she needs to. Mali stands back up.
“Hi!”
Jasmine smiles. “Hey. Thanks for letting us check the place out.”
Jasmine already knows most of the grounds are accessible. There’s a path that runs along the perimeter of the pitch, so they can sit on the opposite stands. Public places usually have accessibility, but it’s a secondary thought. It takes you to the right place, but it takes ten times as long to get there, and a map is usually needed. According to Google Maps, there are some steps on this side. Lani can walk, but if she’s in pain, Jasmine likes to know if she’ll need to carry her for a long period or leave her chair somewhere. Then, she knows what bag to bring and if they need her braces.
“Sure! It’s a bit busy right now,” Mali says, and she ushers them through the office. “I think they should be done tomorrow, but you can see it early.”
Jasmine frowns. “See what?”
When they get outside, it’s a building site. Ezra and Zach are sweaty and topless, and there’s at least one other personJasmine doesn’t recognise. The turf has been taken up, and bags of concrete are everywhere.
And Frankie, with a shovel…Oh, fuck.She leans her elbow on it, her leg cocked slightly as she drinks some water. Jasmine tries desperately with her mind to get it to spill down Frank’s chest.
It doesn’t, and Jasmine will just ignore her. As soon as she can tear her eyes away from Frankie’s sweaty figure, she’ll check the steps and go.
