Page 83 of Silver Lining
And though tall reinforced windows faced the street, very little light illuminated the gloom within.
He had believed he wanted to spend his days here.
When Wally stood, Max stared as if observing a stranger dressed in stiffly formal attire. He noted the gold chain across his brother's vest, a gift from Howard and exactly like the chain Howard wore. He remembered the rash on Wally's neck caused by the chaffing of his high starched collar. He studied the fulsome dark mustache that Philadelphia had wheedled and coaxed his brother to grow.
And he saw himself as he might have been, refashioned to please a woman. Dressed as a somber dandy in uncomfortable clothing and shoes and wearing an itchy mustache.
Whatever expression constricted his features caused Wally to flush deeply and turn aside, and he regretted that. Tonight, when Wally came to help Louise, Max would make things right. He would tell Wally that the right brother had taken the bank position. He would express his genuine pride in his brother's success and rapid rise and wholeheartedly wish him well. And he would silently thank God that he was not spending his days in this airless, musty countinghouse.
Once outside, he breathed deep of the fresh cold air and settled his hat on his head before he reached into his pocket and gripped the green marble. A moment later he was astride Marva Lee and heading out of town.
Every day he exercised his arm and every day his arm became a little stronger. It wouldn't relieve Louise's burden when he returned to work, and he hated that, but soon he'd be able to spare Wally and Dave.
*
Recently Livvy had taken to serving tea and toast in the parlor every afternoon at three. Philadelphia couldn't guess why her mother-in-law had decided to do this, but she was embarrassingly grateful for something to look forward to as a break in her long, boring day. Sometimes Gilly and Sunshine rode to the main house to join them, but more often, like today, she and Livvy were alone.
"Are you feeling well?" Livvy inquired, studying Philadelphia across the tea table. Livvy was an overbearing and unpleasant woman, but she had her moments. It was annoying, but kind of her to worry about Philadelphia 's health.
"Really, Mother McCord, there's nothing to be concerned about. My back aches, and it's difficult to find a comfortable sleeping position. Otherwise I feel fine."
"I know you're tired of hearing this, but I wish you would consult a doctor."
This subject again. Striving for patience, she explained her position yet another time. "First, I couldn't endure being examined by a man. Second, I don't trust Dr. Pope's discretion. Finally, I don't want to risk my condition being noticed by going into town."
"I'm deeply worried about you and the baby."
To conceal her irritation, Philadelphia lowered her head over her teacup. Livvy seldom had time to read, so they couldn't discuss literature. Her mother-in-law sewed, but she didn't do embroidery or fine work.
Livvy had little appreciation for china painting, and they had few acquaintances in common. There was little they could talk about except the baby.
"I'm quite strong, I assure you, and I feel fine." She searched her mind for a topic of mutual interest but could think of nothing.
"The thing is, you have no experience." Frowning, Livvy tilted her head to one side. "You're due to deliver in about six weeks, but anyone looking at you would assume you're two or three months from your delivery date. That's why I'm concerned."
Six weeks? Tea slopped into the saucer as she counted in her mind. She hated her predicament so much that she ignored it to the best of her ability and seldom thought about the delivery or the delivery date.
Though she knew it was ridiculous, she cherished a secret hope that if she didn't acknowledge her swelling belly, her pregnancy would disappear.
"I don't wish to alarm you," Livvy continued, hesitating. "But I feel I should mention that sometimes our first pregnancy doesn't end as happily as we would wish."
Philadelphia raised her eyebrows.
Reaching across the table, Livvy set aside Philadelphia 's cup and saucer and then clasped her hands.
"I lost two babies before Max was born. Both times I suspected something was wrong because, like you, I didn't go into maternity clothing until late, and I wasn't nearly as large as I should have been. As it turned out, both babies were weak and puny and died shortly after delivery."
She had no idea what to say. "I'm sorry."
"I mention this only because I know you must be concerned as I was. And because it might go easier if you prepare yourself for all possibilities. It occurred to me that you have no one to answer whatever questions you may have. I apologize that I've been remiss in this regard. I urge you to ask anything you like, and I'll answer as frankly as I can."
"Well, there is something… do babies always come when they're supposed to?"
Livvy released her hands and poured more tea for them both. "Not always. First babies in particular often arrive early."
"But they can come later than expected?"
"Gilly arrived ten days later than I'd calculated." She smiled. "The midwife said Gilly came close to setting a record. But she'd tended one delivery where the baby was nearly two weeks overdue. That doesn't happen often, I would say."
