Page 91 of The Blonde Who Came in from the Cold
Alex didn’t know what was happening, but her gaze was suddenly blurry. Like a windshield in the rain with busted wipers. But it didn’t make any sense, because Alex didn’t cry. Alex didn’tlong.
The thing that Alex had wanted since she was nine years old, she had. The person she wanted to be, she was. She was already living her Best-Case Scenario, but the way he looked at her said that moment was his Break in Case of Emergency. And the emergency... was her.
But...
She was shaking her head. She was backing away. It was way too much and way too soon, and Alex cursed the hole in her side because she wanted to turn around and run as fast as she could. But then she realized what this meant: King wouldn’t be waiting when she got there...
“What is it?” His voice was softer. Closer. “Sweetheart, tell me...”
“I’m...” She’d been so happy a week ago when she’d gotten the call from Langley and been told about the assignment. It had seemed like such a good thing. But now... “I’m going undercover.”
“You don’t have to go.” He actually let out a deep breath, like this wasn’t so bad, this could be fixed.
“No. It’s important.”
“So are you. So are we.”
“It’s Kozlov.”
He froze. He went so still so quickly that she had to wonder if hewas even breathing. But she could see his mind working, like clockwork, gears turning. She could actually see his mind change course.
“Okay.” He straightened. “One last mission. Together.”
“No.”
“I’m going with you.”
“You can’t.”
“But—”
“It’s not a mission,” Alex blurted, and she knew the moment when he realized what that meant, but she said it anyway. “I’m going into deep cover.”
But King was shaking his head. “No.”
“I have to. Now. Before I’m too well known. They need a female operative—”
“No.”
“Someone with experience but who isn’t likely to be recognized.” It was her saddest smile. “I’m perfect.”
The old King—herKing—would have made some caustic comment about perfection. He would have teased or maybe chided. He wouldn’t have looked so terrified, he could scream. But this new King—her new King—looked dry and gray like dust.
“I have to do this.” Alex stared down at her hands. She was brave enough to go deep inside one of the most dangerous organizations in the world, but she wasn’t brave enough to look at Michael Kingsley. “I know you don’t think I’m good enough.”
“Are you kidding me?” He pushed away, words like a knife between them, cutting that moment into two separate pieces: before and after. “That’s not it, and you know it.”
She didn’t know it. She didn’t even know whatitwas, and he must have seen it in her eyes because he gave a sad smile.
“You’re the best, Alexandra Sterling. You were always the best.Wewere the best.” He swallowed hard. “Or maybe I’m the only one who felt it.”
He wasn’t. She’d felt it too. At every step, it had been there, beating beneath her skin like a pulse, but that didn’t change the fact that—
“I have to do this, Michael. I have to.... This is all I ever wanted to be. Since I was nine years old. It’s the only way bad people can do good things, so—”
“Is that what you think?”
She couldn’t take it—the softness of his voice. She couldn’t look at him. That was how a girl gets burned.
