Page 23 of Pretend to be Mine
Savannah
I’m tired from all the travel and constant activity today. The drinking only adds to my exhaustion, and I waste no time in taking a long, hot bath. I didn’t tell Ben, but I took the better room—the one with the jacuzzi tub. I fill it up, add in some of the complementary bubbles, and slide in after turning on the jets. The lights are dimmed, and the room is quiet around me. The hot water helps me warm my overly chilled body and it puts my mind at ease. I think about all that is changing between Ben and me.
I know we’re friends. I know this dating game is just pretend, but something is changing between us. I ignored the almost-kiss. I didn’t bring it up when we had our little water fight and I felt just how excited he really was. But both of those things tell me that he’s feeling the change, too. I wonder if it will end our friendship or if it could lead us to something more. My internal panic returns. Do I want more? With Ben? What if it doesn’t work out?
I push the thoughts from my head and just stay in the moment, relaxing in a hot tub of bubbles. I don’t get out until my skin is wrinkly, and when I do, I go straight to bed. I fall asleep fast, but it isn’t deep. I never sleep well when I’m away from home. The bed is too firm, the pillows too soft, and the blankets feel over-washed and starched. I pull on my sleep mask and get the feeling that someone is watching me. I’ve seen too many hotel murder documentaries—I yank the mask off and check the room around me. It’s clear. I decide to sleep with the TV on. I watch reruns of Friends until I have no choice but to fall asleep. It feels like I’ve just closed my eyes, when I open them to find it light out.
I groan as I reach for my phone on the nightstand. I pick it up to find that it’s already almost noon. Noon? How did I sleep that late? The party starts at five. I still have plenty of time to get ready, but still. I never sleep this late. I guess all the traveling really did wear me out.
I push the blankets back and get out of bed. I feel stiff from lying down all night, but I shake it off as I make my way toward the bathroom to shower. Already, anxiety is getting the best of me, but I decide to focus on the task at hand. I step into the shower and take extra time to make sure I am thorough. I wash and condition my hair twice, I shave what feels like my entire body, I exfoliate, and I use my extra-moisturizing in-shower lotion. When I step out, I slather my entire body in more lotion and then pull on some comfy clothes while I do my hair and makeup.
I don’t have any missed calls or texts from Ben, so I assume he’s still in bed and opt to order room service while my hair air dries a little. I place an order for some coffee, yogurt, fruit, and two hard boiled eggs, wanting to keep things on the lighter side today—I’m so nervous about the party that I know my stomach can’t hold anything too heavy.
I watch the news while I eat and enjoy my coffee, and, when everything is finished, I get back to work. I blow dry my hair and run a straightener through the top, so I don’t have any frizz or fly-aways, then use the straightener to curl the length of my hair. I pull back the sides and pin them with fancy clips so that my face is fully exposed. Finally, I spray it with a super-hold hairspray, so I don’t have to worry about it coming undone.
With my hair ready, I move onto my face. I go through the normal steps: moisturize, prime, foundation, concealer, setting powder, highlight, and contour. Then I focus on my eyes and brows. I decide on a classic look tonight, so I use a silver in the inner corner with some added sparkle and the shadow turns to black on the outer corner. I line them just enough and apply lashes and mascara. I grab my red lipstick and lip liner and finish the look off with a bold lip.
Stepping back from the mirror, I look like exactly the woman my mother expects me to be. You’d think that would settle my nerves some, but nope. I feel twice as anxious. I’m worried that she will take one look at Ben and know we’re not together. Or worse, what if my plan doesn’t work, and she asks about James anyway?
My heart starts to race, and my breathing picks up. I start to feel lightheaded and I have no choice but to sit in the floor on the cold bathroom tile, trying to get myself under control.
“Savannah? Are you okay?” Ben asks, rushing to my side.
I turn to see the door between our rooms now standing wide open.
I nod as he reaches for me. He pulls me up and walks me over to the bed where we both sit down.
“What’s wrong?”
I shake my head, dismissing his worry. “I’m fine. I’m just nervous. I’m starting to freak out a little.”
He offers up a smile as he takes one of my hands into his. “Everything will be fine. I swear, I can do this. I won’t let you down.”
“But…what if my plan doesn’t work and they still ask about James?”
He scoffs. “I’ll be so charming that they’ll be asking, James who?”
I laugh through my panic.
“Everything will be great. You’ll see. Now, go get dressed. We have to get going.”
I nod my head and stand, grabbing my bagged dress off the foot of the bed and going into the bathroom to change. I hang the bag on the back of the door and unzip it until my white dress is visible. I free the dress and leave it hanging as I remove my clothes. I manage to get the dress on and I stand back, looking at myself in the full-length mirror. The dress is sleeveless, and the bodice is tight. It pushes my boobs up and makes them look bigger and fuller. There’s light bead work on the bodice that fades away at the waist where the skirt flows loosely. It’s satin, soft and smooth on my skin, and it looks perfect with my hair and makeup.
I open the bathroom door and step out. Ben is still sitting on the bed, but I walk past him to the table where I left my shoes. I brace myself against the wall as I put them on. When I turn around, I find him staring at me, lips parted.
I laugh. “What? Do I look like a troll or something?”
He snaps his mouth shut and stands, walking over to me. “You’re beautiful.”
“Awe, thanks. But the fake dating doesn’t start for another twenty minutes. Let’s go.” I lead the way.
“Don’t you want a coat or something?”
“And ruin all my hard work? No way!”
I hear him chuckle behind me, but he follows along, down to the ground level and out to the car we rented at the airport. I pull up GPS on the screen on the dash; that way I don’t have to worry about telling him turn by turn directions. He climbs behind the wheel and we’re off.
As he drives, he reaches over and takes my hand in his, giving it a light squeeze. “Everything will be alright.”
