Page 4 of Nanny Crush
“What’s for dessert?” Xander asks.
I move over to the cabinet and find a box of pre-packaged brownies. I pull one out and split it in half for the two of them. “Eat all your dinner first,” I tell them, handing each of them their half.
While they eat, I clean up the mess I’ve made in the kitchen and try to find something for myself. There isn’t much, so I settle with a sandwich and a few of their fries. After dinner is bath time. I fill the tub for Xander and let him climb in. He’s old enough to wash himself while Maddy and I play in her room. When he gets out, I put her in the tub and get her clean. We have an hour left until bedtime and I’m already exhausted.
I sit on the couch and let them play as I watch the clock until I can put them into bed and get some more work done. Maddy brings me over a little plastic teacup, and I must pretend to drink it, or she’ll lose her shit. Xander refuses to play along, and he goes into the corner and starts building a tower with his mega blocks.
Halfway through this construction, Maddy decides to turn into Godzilla, and she crashes through his tower, and he yells and cries about how she destroyed his masterpiece. I calm him down and chastise Maddy for ruining something her brother worked so hard on, but she carries on completely unfazed like she didn’t just get into trouble.
Thirty minutes until bedtime and both kids are playing nicely together, the demolition completely forgotten. I’m able to just sit and unwind until Maddy throws a wooden block and hits Xander in the head. He gets mad and slaps her arm. Now they’re both crying and in my lap.
Ten minutes until bedtime and I’ve gotten them both calmed down. We’re all on the couch, reading a bedtime story about two bunnies who don’t get along. The bunnies become friends and the book ends and we all go upstairs to brush their teeth. Xander does it himself, and I have to help Maddy. Finally, I’m able to put them both into bed.
I flop back down in my computer chair with a heavy sigh, now so tired I don’t know if I’ll even be able to get any work done. I love my kids to death, but they are exhausting. The sooner I can get someone in here to help out, the better.
I lean my head back against the chair and close my eyes as I take a few deep breaths to release my anxiety. I focus on clearing my mind, finding any energy that may be left in my body, and focusing on what I need to do right now, in this moment. When I open my eyes, I sit up straight and dive back into the computer and working all the kinks out of the game.
I manage to wipe out a large section of the game’s bugs before my eyes start to hurt and my back feels stiff. I lean back and look at the clock on the top, right corner of my computer screen. It’s nearly three A.M. Luckily for me, it’s a Saturday, so the kids won’t have school to get off to in the morning. I shut everything down and head toward bed, hoping and praying the kids manage to sleep in a little bit and don’t wake up at the ass crack of dawn demanding breakfast.
I fall into bed, not even bothering to remove my clothes or shoes. I fluff the pillow beneath my head and my eyes fall closed. I’m fast asleep in minutes.
It feels like I’ve only just fallen asleep, but I wake with Maddy climbing up on my bed. “Daddy. Daddy,” she says, shaking me.
“What is it?” I ask, voice thick with sleep.
“I scared.”
“Why are you scared?”
“It dark in my room. I sleep wif yew?”
“Fine, lay down,” I tell her.
She lays at my side and doesn’t make another peep, but all through the night, I get woken up by punches. She punches me in the eye, she kicks me in the balls, and once she even manages to roll completely on top of me. How the hell can she sleep like that? I pick her up and lay her back on the bed. She never wakes up and I’m able to drift back to sleep every time after pushing past the blinding pain that caused me to wake up in the first place.
I wake again to Xander jumping on the bed. When I open my eyes, the room is full of light. I look at the clock and see that it’s only seven-thirty.
“What are you doing, man? Why aren’t you asleep?”
He shrugs. “I don’t know. I woke up. I’m hungry.”
“Me too!” Maddy yells as she sits up beside me.
I let out a long breath. “Alright. Let’s go find breakfast.”
Both kids jump up and go running down the stairs. I walk into the bathroom to relieve my bladder and then I splash some cold water on my face to wake up. I brush my teeth and head downstairs to find the kids some breakfast and to fill up on coffee. Xander is already turning the TV on, flipping through the channels in search of his favorite Saturday morning cartoons. Maddy is sitting in her toy box playing with whatever she finds. I start the coffee pot and then open the fridge, only then remembering that I need to go to the store as soon as possible. I guess that will be on today’s list. Go to the store, do some laundry so the kids will have some clean clothes for school tomorrow, and pick up this house a little bit.
I have a few eggs, so I crack them into a bowl, pour in some milk, and mix it all together while some bacon cooks in a pan on the stove. I toss a couple pieces of bread in the toaster and butter them when they pop out. I scramble the eggs and put it all on their plates. There is one banana left, so I peel it and slice it, adding that to their plates, then finish it off with a couple of strawberries. I pour them both a glass of orange juice and call them to the table. I put Maddy in her highchair and the two of them dig in.
“This is good. Why don’t we get this before school?” Xander asks.
“We just don’t have a lot of time before school,” I tell him as I take a bite of buttered toast. “We have to go to the store today. What do you want for breakfast and lunch for the week?”
“Pancakes!” Maddy yells. She loves anything covered in sugar.
I laugh and add pancakes to the list.
“I want those peanut butter and jelly sandwiches you buy sometimes,” Xander says.
