Page 39 of Pills and Potions: Kase
Diamond rolled her eyes with expert precision. “Boy, if you don’t take your TED Talkin’, vibranium-thong fantasizin’, cocoa butter-scented asshome?—”
Then the doors flew open, and I wasliterally tossedonto the sidewalk. My people didn’t help. They just stood there laughing.
“Nigga… what is WRONG with you?” Vernon asked, wiping tears. “You out here givin’ speeches like you onP-Valley: The Healing Edition.”
I laid there, starin’ up at the streetlight, confused and emotionally glitter-bombed.
Three hours later, I was home, mad as hell. I couldn’t believe I didn’t bring a stripper home and got my ass kicked out. Me. Kase Madoxx. I always left with somebody, but I was too focused on giving them hoes healing.
I laid back on my bed, shirt off, remote in hand, starin’ at the TV but not watchin’ a damn thing. My mind just kept echoing the same words on loop like some cursed voicemail.
“You weird.”
Damn, Diamond really said that with her whole chest, too. Shit, I didn’t know what the hell was going on ‘cause I was acting off. My swag was down a hundred.
I stared up at the ceiling, still mad at the air, when my phone lit up, FaceTime. It wasBlyss.
I squinted at the screen. Why the hell is she callin’ me right now? Ain’t it her bedtime? Don’t she got a lizard to feed or a NASA podcast to binge?
I hovered overdecline, but curiosity and maybe the leftover stripper glitter in my brain, got the best of me.
I answered, proppin’ the phone on my pillow. “What?”
Her big brown eyes and goofy-ass smile filled the screen like she was shootin’ a toothpaste commercial. “Hey, Kase.”
I sighed. “What’s up?”
That awkward lil snort-laugh crept out her nose before she said, “Sooo I heard... you got kicked out the strip club for startin’ a glitter-themed healing circle.”
I blinked slow. “Man. Jace tellin’ my business to Tuesday again.”
Right on cue, I heard Tuesday’s loud-ass voice in the background:
“HE SAID THE STRIPPER HAD SYMMETRY! GIRL, HE WAS OUT THERE TALKIN’ BOUTSPIRITUAL KNEECAPS!”
Blyss tried to hold it together, brows wiggling like she was innocent. “I mean… it’s a valid point. Balance is important in dance.”
“Y’all play too much,” I frowned,
She leaned in, dead serious. “Want me to send you a few links? Most commercial glitter is made from a combination of aluminum and plastic. It starts as big sheets, then it’s cut down super small using high-precision blades. It’s kinda fascinating.”
I sat up slow, squintin’. “...Are you trolling me right now?”
Her face stayed soft and sweet like she ain’t just hit me with stripper glitter science. “Nope. I just figured after your… environmental meltdown, you might wanna be informed. It’s important to be eco-conscious, Kase.”
I stared at the screen, unamused.
From the background, Tuesday kept goin’, loud and reckless: “TELL HIM WE GOT BIODEGRADABLE STRIPPERS OVER HERE AT TUESDAY’S LOUNGE! NO HEALING, JUST HUMPIN’!”
“Tuesday! SHUT. UP!” Blyss shouted off camera, face red with laughter.
I shook my head, tryin’ to hold back my smirk. “You got way too much time on your hands.”
She giggled. “Maybe. Or maybe you just needed someone to talk to after getting emotionally ghosted by three sparkly women.”
“You think this funny, huh?”
“Maybe,” Blyss laughed, covering her mouth.
