Page 38 of It Shouldn't Be You
Every word she says goes in one ear and out the other. But the two that keep circling like a death sentence are anovulation and infertile. She goes on to list things we can do to improve my chances of ovulating, but it all feels hopeless.
Will Logan even care to stick it out with me if I can’t give him a family?
An heir?
What about my dreams of having a mini-me to shower with love?
It feels like everything is moving in slow motion and at two times the speed at the same time. In a blink of an eye, the doctor leaves us alone and Logan is kneeling in front of me, cupping my jaw with gentle hands, wiping my tears away as he vows, “It’ll be okay, Abigail. I swear to you we’ll get through this together. I’m going nowhere.”
The rest of the day passes in a blur.
While my mind was racing a million miles an hour, Logan handled everything. From getting us home to bundling us into bed despite it still being early afternoon. Through it all, he kept a hold of me, as if he could tell my thoughts had me on another planet and I was in need of grounding. And as he clutched me to his chest, sharing his strength with me, a part of me wished he could just squeeze all my broken parts back together.
Somewhere in the middle of the night, my tears dry up, and I roll over to face him. Moonlight paints his features, bathing him in a cool glow. I place soft kisses all over his face until, with a groan, his grey eyes open and focus on me.
“Make love to me,” I plead in a whisper so as not to disturb the peace that blankets us.
With gentle hands, he rolls me onto my back and leans down to kiss me, pouring all his love into that one action. With a moan, I arch my back so I’m closer to him and wrap my arms around his neck. I want to become one with him. The idea of space separating us right now is abhorrent so when he reaches between us to test my readiness, I tell him, “I’m ready, Lo. Please, I need this.”
With a groan, he seals his mouth to mine as he eases inside me. Feeling the fullness that comes from taking him into my body sets my soul on fire and with a gasp, I wrench my head back as I arch closer to him. Digging my nails into his shoulders causes him to let out a curse.
“Fuck, baby. You are so perfect. Every inch of you is perfect and I can’t wait to spend forever showing you that.” With that, he claims my mouth again and speeds up his thrusts. The feeling of his thick cock stretching me, coupled with his words, has me coming on a gasp and dragging him over that edge with me.
And as he fills me with his seed and showers me with kisses and praise-filled words, I fall a little more for this man.
For my husband.
Chapter 32
Nothing could have prepared me for the words the doctor spoke yesterday, or for the catatonic state Abigail was in afterward. She was so out of it that she didn’t even notice Cole, Smithy, Alex, and the girls gathered in the hall when we came back, their faces full of questions I refused to answer. It’s not my place to share. If she wants them to know, she'll tell them when she’s ready. After informing them as much and instructing them to continue whatever Abigail had laid out for them, I spent the rest of the day and night just holding her.
I’ll take her to get a thousand opinions if she wants, try every experimental drug on the market, or leave it up to fate. But until she voices what she wants, there’s not much more I can do than offer her comfort.
“Are you sure you still want to go through with this? Give me the word and I’ll call it off and take all the heat. Nobody will dare say a word to you about it,” I say as I look at her in the mirror while straightening my tie, meeting her green eyes narrowed in concentration as she fixes her eyeliner.
“I’m sure. Far too much work and excitement have gone into this to call it off now. Plus, I kind of want to let my hair down and forget about everything for a few hours, you know?”
“Fine, but the moment you look like you’ve had enough I’m dragging your ass out of there, even if I have to toss you over my shoulder,” I tell her as I turn to take her in my arms and kiss her forehead. She’s already warned me off kissing her and ruining her blood red lipstick, and considering our guests started arriving twenty minutes ago, we’re already late enough. I’ll just have to mess it up later.
“I have to say, you look very handsome for someone who’s spent all day trying to beg out of this.”
“What kind of husband would I be if I let you down, hmm?” After seeing the black sparkly bodycon dress with a high slit and red heels laid out on the bed, I picked my outfit accordingly. Luckily, I have a tie the same shade as her shoes or I’d have been stealing one of Alex’s.
“Fair point, now come on. I’m dying to see how everything turned out,” she says as she steps out of my embrace, before taking me by the hand and leading me downstairs. Even though upstairs is firmly off limits to everyone, the banister has been decorated with fairy lights and garland, and the bottom couple of stairs have pumpkins on them to keep with the spooky vibe Abigail and the girls worked so hard to pull off.
Following the chatter coming from the living room, we head that way and I have to say I’m impressed. Somehow the room looks like the perfect blend between a Halloween party and the typical mafia gathering. It truly is amazing what she can pull off when she puts her mind to it. As we make the rounds of hellos and handshakes, everyone expresses how amazing everything looks, and at least five people ask for her card to book her to plan a party for them.
“Looks like you’re going to be busy party planning on the lead-up to Christmas,” I tease her as we make a stop near the food table to grab a few bites of Kelly’s delicious spread. Watching the blush coat her cheeks just reinforces my desire to show her just how valued she is here.
If it’s party planning, baking, or even opening her dream cat café, it’s clear she’ll have plenty of custom and support. The only thing stopping her seems to be her indecision, but maybe she doesn’t have to choose. Who’s to say she can't hire the girls to do the party planning while she invests her time elsewhere?
“Shh you. Don’t worry, I’ll still have plenty of time to throw a Christmas gala that you get to host.”
“Don’t remind me,” I groan, tipping back my whiskey and relishing the burn. Social events are far from my thing, and I doubt that will ever change. But if it means getting to have an opportunity to show off my beautiful wife and her skills, then that’s a small price to pay for such a high pleasure.
“I’ll let it drop if you come dance with me.” As if she ever needs to bribe me to do that. Any excuse to hold her tight is a win in my book.
"Admit it. You had a good time," Abigail teases me with a poke to my ribs as we stand side by side brushing our teeth, hours later.
