Page 48 of She Likes It, Hey Micah
“I wanted to see the person responsible for saving your life, Fischer, so I ran into her at the grocery store and took her out to dinner. That’s it. And honestly, she’s kind of perfect for you.”
I pinch the bridge of my nose, hating how quickly the jealousy has risen like bile in my throat. “She’s nothing like me.”
“Exactly.”
Though a headache is forming between my eyes, I consider what he said about saving my life. I don’t think it’s as dramatic as that, but I had definitely been feeling like every step I took pulled me deeper into the quicksand that was my life and my career. Yeah, I’m only thirty-two, and plenty of thirty-two-year-olds are still figuring out their lives. But mine was figured. I’d had the same plan since I was fifteen. Build a business, make tons of money, retire at forty-five and maybe look into settling down with someone once my life was set.
Then I met Miranda, and I started to wonder if there was more to life than money and business. I started to think maybe I loved her.
Look where that got me.
Micah may have brought light back into my life, but that’s as far as I can ever let things go. Love and I don’t mix.
“Nothing is going to happen with Micah,” I say, glancing behind me to make sure I’m still alone. The last thing I need is her finding out that I’m talking about her. “She deserves better than me, anyway.”
“Yeah, she does.”
I scowl. “I thought you said she was perfect for me.”
“Yeah. But that doesn’t mean you’re perfect for her.”
“Thanks for your confidence.”
He cackles, and I regret ever answering the phone. “I thought you said nothing was going to happen, so why does it matter? You’re missing one important word, Fischer: yet. You’re not perfect for heryet.”
But I could be? I don’t like the hope that settles in my chest because it means my attempts at curbing my enthusiasm are failing. I’m supposed to be indifferent and objective and focus on the project even though my whole focus today has been onher. I have one week to make sure this lodge doesn’t fail or I’m out of options, and I barely care what happens as long as Micah doesn’t think any less of me when it’s over.
This isn’t who I am, and I hate that a pretty face with a heart of gold has completely derailed my goals.
“You okay there, Fischer?”
He knows. I don’t know how he knows, but Kale is all too aware of how easily Micah forced herself into my life and made me care about something beyond my career.
I groan. “This weekend is going to kill me,” I tell him. “So don’t expect any rent next month.”
“Ha! You made another funny. This girl is clearly good for you. So don’t screw this up.”
He hangs up before I can respond, though I don’t know what I would have said anyway.
Is Micah good for me? Probably. Does she pose a risk to my job? Absolutely. Do I wish I wasn’t terrified of vulnerability? Maybe. Yes. Always. But I’ve never been good at getting close to people, and when I’ve tried in the past, it has never worked out well for me. My gut tells me that the only risk in opening up to Micah is a broken heart when she realizes she deserves better and moves on to someone more worthy of her, but that feels like a pretty big risk.
I meant what I told Kale. This weekend is going to kill me.
“Hey,” a soft voice says, and Micah returns with some clothes slung over her arms. “I raided the staff uniforms because I figured you might want something fresh to wear, though I had to guess your size because I know nothing about men’s clothing.”
That means she’s probably never been in a serious relationship. Why do I like that idea so much?
“Thanks,” I tell her, taking the polo and slacks. I notice she has her own outfit, which means we’re going to match. The thought brings a smile to my face.
“Twice!” Micah says, pointing at me with a huge grin. “That’s twice I’ve gotten you to smile. Who would have thought a tacky shirt would do the trick?”
Though a minute ago I’d been considering going to bed, now I have no desire to waste a moment with this woman. I still doubt this can go anywhere, but I’m going to enjoy her company while I can. While we’re isolated from the world and I can’t hurt her.
“Meet you back in the lobby?” I say and give her a half smile that brings a flood of color into her face.
“Yeah,” she breathes. “Sounds great.”
I watch her bounce out of the kitchen and remind myself to be careful, just like Kale said.
