Page 78 of She Likes It, Hey Micah
I smile down at her. “I will. Eventually.”
I make it all the way to the door before she says, “Why don’t you want to date me, Fischer?”
I freeze. “What?”
She’s on her feet, though she doesn’t come any closer. It’s like she’s afraid to scare me off if she does. Ducking her head, she wraps a hand around her elbow in that same closed-off stance she had when she left the restaurant. “We’ve known each other for two weeks now, and you haven’t asked me out. I’m not… I’m not trying to be vain, and I know not everyone is going to be interested in me. But you do seem interested. So why don’t you want to date me?”
This is not what I expected from tonight, but I appreciate her directness. It almost makes it easy to answer. “Because you deserve someone who’s perfect for you, and that isn’t me.”
She clenches her jaw, folding her arms now. “That’s not a reason. Try again.”
Does she really want me to answer? I think she does, and even though my first response was true, I give her the one that scares me the most. “I don’t know if I’m capable of love.”
She doesn’t have a response to that. I didn’t expect her to. And though it’s probably a bad idea, I step forward and pull her into my arms, telling her with that embrace that I want to be capable of being that man she deserves. “But I’m trying to be.”
I just hope it’s enough.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Micah
October 23
The next two days aremadness. As the lodge reopening looms closer, Lila has me triple checking with vendors and counting dishes and sorting decorations long into the night. The only reason I’m okay with it is because all of the planners are working late too, though I honestly have no idea what they’re doing because they’re not doing anything related to the event, as far as I can tell. So maybe the only reason I’m okay with it is because it means I can make sure this reopening goes off without a hitch.
It’s ridiculously stressful, and not even a call from Chad can get me to relax.
“Hey,” I say into my phone on Wednesday morning. I’m deep into wiring LED lights around the branches of a few fake trees in our storage room on the first floor of our building, so I’m not really focused on the call.
Chad picks up on that immediately. “You sound funny.”
I shrug. “Sorry, just a little busy. What’s up?”
“I love you.”
I pause, pulling my phone away from my ear to look at the screen. As if that might help me make sense of what he just said. “What?”
“I know I don’t say it a lot, but I love you. You, and Houston, and Brooklyn. You’re all great.”
My heart beats faster as nerves build in my stomach. “Chad? Is something wrong?” Is he suddenly dying or something? Did he get abducted by a wronged client?
He laughs, though it sounds more like a giggle than his usual low chuckle. “Nah. Everything is great. I just miss you.”
“You sound drunk.”
“Just drugs.”
I nearly drop my phone. “What? Are youhigh?”
“Pfft. High. I’m low. I’m on the floor right now because trouble won’t let me go outside and I’m sick of the couch.”
There’s definitely something wrong with him, but I don’t know what to do about it because he’s usually the one with the answers. “Chad, you’re scaring me.”
He groans. “No, that’s not what I… Drugs. I mean pills. Pain pills. They make me weird.” He groans again, like he knows exactly how little sense he’s making. “Hope is dangerous.”
He can say that again. I keep hoping Fischer will stop by, but I haven’t seen him since Monday night. He and Grant are finalizing things on their end, making sure the lodge is cleaned and ready to go, with food and power and all the necessary permits and licenses. He keeps texting me, though. It’s never anything special, mostly just “would you rather” questions that relate to the work we’re both doing, but I’m glad I’ve been on his mind.
“Are you okay, Chad?” I ask. Maybe I can convince Fischer to drive me to Laketown after the reopening on Saturday so I can check on my brother. It wouldn’t be that far out of the way.
