Page 83 of She Likes It, Hey Micah
Blinking, Mom stares at me like she’s never seenmebefore. Maybe she never considered my side of things because she’s been so wrapped up in her own love story. “You haven’t been in love?” she asks, and with the way she grimaces, I can tell that question is as weird for her to ask as it is for me to hear it.
“No.” But I squirm because I’m not sure if that’s accurate anymore. I stuff my hands into my hair as my parents glance at each other. “Well, I might be now. I don’t know.”
Getting to her feet, Mom holds out her hand to me. “Let’s go for a walk, Fischer. I want to know all about this girl youmightbe in love with.”
I’ve never talked about personal things with my mom. When we did talk, it was about school, or work, or how I should have worked with them instead of setting off on my own and losing everything. I can see in her face that she thinks this is as strange as I do, but there’s hopefulness in her eyes as well. It’s like she’s pleading for me to give her a chance even though she thinks she doesn’t deserve one.
My mind shifts back to Micah. She barely got to know her mom, and I know she would pummel me if she knew I was hesitating right now. What if I never get this chance again? Could I live with myself for wasting something so precious?
So I take Mom’s hand and let her lead me out into the massive garden behind the house.
I tell her everything, talking to my mom in a way I never have before. I talk to her in a way I’ve never talked toanyonebefore. Not even Micah. It’s like knowing a person can change even after being the same way for so long gave me permission to lay myself bare and be the man I’ve always kept tucked away. The one who hates being alone and likes to smile and laugh and desperately wishes he was brave enough to do something about how he feels when it comes to Micah Taylor.
I don’t just tell Mom about Micah, though she’s the dominant subject of the conversation because I can’t bring myself to stop talking about her. But we talk about other things too, things I’ve never been able to vocalize. I fill Mom in on what Miranda did and how I don’t feel like I can trust anyone anymore because I was so sure that she and I were in it together. I even talk about Grant and how hard it is for me to watch his life spiral because there’s only so much I can do to help him when he doesn’t let me handle more of his business.
“You know he’s probably scared, right?” Mom directs us to a stone bench nestled in a bunch of purple daisies. We’ve been walking through the garden, which is still vibrant with color even in October. “He and Sonia weren’t always good together, and they married too quickly, but Grant tried his best to make things work. Now, Dexter barely wants anything to do with him, Sonia took more than she should have in the divorce, and he’s afraid he’ll have nothing left if his business fails as well. That’s a lot of pressure.”
I guess I never thought what it would be like from his perspective. “How do you know?” I ask anyway.
Mom smiles. “He’s my son. Just like you are. I haven’t been the best mother, but I’ve known you boys your whole lives. Give Grant a chance, and maybe he’ll give you one too.”
I won’t hold my breath, but I’ll try to give him some time to show me that all this work I’ve been doing for him will get me somewhere.
“Oh, I love these flowers,” Mom says, breathing deeply. “They’re not very fragrant, but they certainly are beautiful.”
They’re not Micah’s favorite, so I don’t care for them much.
“They remind me of my mother,” Mom continues. “You didn’t know her, but she was always tending her garden and usually had a vase of these in the house. Every time I look at them, I think of her, and it’s like she’s not really gone. These flowers keep her with me.”
I sit up straighter, something sparking in my memory. Okay, it’s more than a spark. It’s like getting hit with a bolt of lightning that leaves me brimming with electricity. “Oh.”
Mom looks at me, frowning. “Oh?”
“I know what her favorite is,” I say, angry because it is so obvious and I should have seen the answer days ago.
And now that it’s staring me in the face, suddenly I have hope.
***
I spend enough time with my parents, chatting both personal and business because there’s a lot to catch up on, that I lose track of time. It’s nearly three o’clock when I look at my watch, and panic sets in quickly. What time was Micah’s family going to do dinner? She didn’t say. Probably because I never responded.
In the middle of my mom telling me about a trip she and Dad are planning, I grab my phone and impatiently wait for it to power up. “I have to go,” I say, almost in a panic. Though both of my parents stare at me like they’ve never seen me like this—they haven’t—I head for the door, shouting as I go. “I’ll come visit again soon! And you should come to Sun City sometime!”
Not the best exit, but I don’t have time for a tearful goodbye.
I wait until I’m on the road and on my way before I call Micah, hoping she’s not annoyed with me for being silent for more than twenty-four hours.
“Uh, hello?” She sounds so confused, and I don’t blame her.
“Micah.”
“You’re actually using your phone as a phone?”
I chuckle, relaxing in my seat. “Call me old-fashioned.”
“I was just going to call you old, but that works too.”
I think I love this girl. Just hearing the sound of her voice calms my every anxiety, and I urge my car to go faster so I can get back to her sooner. “Does the offer to join you for dinner still stand?”
