Page 35 of Thunderstruck
Though he moves to the fridge, he stops with his hand on the handle and looks back at me. “Can I ask you something?”
Shrugging, I brace myself for whatever it might be. If he has to ask about asking, that means I probably won’t like it. “Sure.”
“Why come all the way to Los Angeles when you don’t know anyone here?”
Yep. I don’t like it. But the man is making me dinner, so I force a smile and get to my feet. “Can I answer that later? I promise I’ll tell you, but I’m going to have to work up to it.”
He waits until I approach him and am only a foot away, and he studies me as if hoping to find the answer to his question on my face. “You don’t have to tell me anything, Carissa.”
There’s no unspoken ‘but’ in his sentence, which I appreciate, but I can see it in his eyes. He’s curious, and that curiosity probably isn’t going to go away if we start carpooling. And since I don’t especially want to take the bus again, that carpooling thing will for sure be happening.
I won’t be able to avoid the question for very long, so I might as well get it over with. “I want to tell you,” I say quietly. “But first, how can I help with dinner?”
Chapter Eleven
Cole
I don’t know whathappened. I started the day angry with Carissa and distrusting everything about her, and by the time we finish the simple meal we made—grilled chicken, fettuccine, and steamed asparagus—she feels almost like a friend. A friend whose smiles hit me square in the chest with terrifying precision every time she unleashes them, which is often.
After the way I treated her, I don’t deserve those smiles, but I have a feeling I’m going to treasure them because they won’t last. I can’t let them last.
Still, I can already tell they’re an addiction I may not be able to shake.
We talked mostly about movies over the last hour and a half, particularly the ones Bonnie and Derek have been in, and that kept our conversation light and impersonal because the topic doesn’t involve either of us. But she promised she would tell me why she came to Los Angeles, and while I don’t want to push her into sharing, I’m desperate to know what happened to her. If it takes this long for her to work up the courage to talk about it, it must be big.
With cleanup done, we’re standing in my kitchen, an awkward silence filling the air between us. Against the curiosity pulsing through me, I nod toward the car keys that she left on the table next to her purse. “I meant it when I said you can borrow the car.”
Her lips twist up. “I know. And I’m grateful.”
I hope that means she’ll take me up on my offer. Not only will I feel better about her ability to get around safely, but it’ll mean I don’t have to get stared at by rideshare drivers who recognize me in their backseats. Some have even tried to pull me into conversation before, something that will be more of a problem now thatHollywood Hot Scoophas turned their attention to me again, and it gets annoyingly tedious to ignore people while trapped in a car with them. I’d much rather spend the drive with Carissa.
Which is a strange feeling. It’s been a long time since I wanted to be around someone.
I clear my throat, desperately searching for a way to nudge our conversation back to where it was before I started cooking. “Would…” How am I so bad at this? There’s an easy answer to that. I haven’t been on a first date in literally years. But this isn’t a date, so it shouldn’t matter. I take a deep breath. “Would you like to sit on the back porch for a bit? My yard isn’t all that big, but it’s nice in the evenings.”
It’s nice in the evenings?I sound like an eighty-year-old woman.
Thankfully, Carissa smiles and nods. “I’d like that. It’s too early for me to go to bed, and I don’t especially want to cry tonight.”
Does that mean she won’t tell me what happened?
She must see my question on my face because she shrugs with a small laugh. “At least not by myself. I’ve never been away from home before, so this is…”
“Hard,” I finish for her, and she nods. “I know the feeling. When I got drafted by the Badgers, it was the first time I wasn’t within easy driving distance of my dad and Gramps. I hated it.”
A sound comes out of Carissa’s mouth that reminds me of the way women coo at puppies and kittens. I don’t love it.
“I was going for solidarity,” I grumble, “not pity.”
That gets her laughing, which is just as endearing as her smiles and makes me wonder if inviting her to stay longer was a bad idea. I’m starting to like her company more than I should, and that can’t end well. “Sorry,” she says despite sounding anything but. “I just didn’t think a big guy like you would get homesick.”
“I happen to really like my dad and Gramps.” Gesturing with my head for her to follow, I lead the way down the hallway and out the back door.
I meant it when I said my yard was small, and aside from a few trees and flower patches, it’s nothing but the small porch that holds a couple of chairs and a glider bench. We sit on the bench, which squeaks when it rocks under our weight. I should probably fix that, but it’s not like I spend much time back here. If I’m not at my dad’s, I’m with Derek or Liam.
I forgot how peaceful it can be back here.
“It’s darling out here,” Carissa says once she’s settled, a solid few inches of space between us. It’s the same word she used when she first walked inside my house, and I can’t decide if it’s good or bad. She obviously likes my house, but that doesn’t mean she likesmeor thinks I fit my space. Sage always thought my house was too quaint for someone of my status, and it was an arguing point on the rare occasions she came down to California. She never understood how much I desperately needed something familiar when everything else in my life was changing. I didn’t plan to settle here permanently, but she never believed me when I told her that.
