Page 44 of Relentless
When the song ended, the band slid straight into another, and she and Cody picked up a popular line dance. A few other folks she recognized from the stage joined them. Two of the backup singers along with the stand-up bass player, and their partners, filled the small space.
And for a moment, she was able to forget everything except the music and the movement.
But as all things do, it came to an end after the second song. The group erupted into applause. The eight dancers all took a dramatic bow before breaking off to visit friends, grab a drink, and otherwise relax. Cody took her hand and walked her back to Ethan. He looked both pleased to see her having so much fun and a little disgruntled that he hadn’t been the one dancing with her.
“Don’t worry, coz,” Cody said, transferring her hand from his to Ethan’s. “I’ll sing at your wedding, and you can dance with her then.”
“You are such an asshole,” Ethan said. Although it was through a laugh, so hard to take seriously.
Cody winked at her before his expression turned serious. “I need to have a little meeting with the band then gather my guitars, but I’ll walk back to the buses with you. Tia told me about Alex’s visit this afternoon, sorry about that,” he added. Tia had texted Kara a few questions after Kara had sent her the heads-up text. She didn’t want to get in the middle of things, but if they were investigating the PA, she also didn’t want to withhold anything that might make firing her easier. Cody hadn’t gone into the details, but firing a PA after so many years together couldn’t be easy. Aside from their history, she assumed they had to be very careful about retaliation. Not that Cody had done anything wrong or untoward. But the hubbub that followed the picture of him and Sabina had aptly demonstrated how easy it was to orchestrate a character assassination. Especially for someone as close to Cody as she was.
“Not a problem. Kara was onto her,” Ethan replied. “We can wait, of course. But don’t hurry on our behalf.”
Cody shook his head. “I’d rather walk back with you.” His gaze swept the area. Anne and Bill were loitering around the perimeter of the room. Tia had her arms crossed and her back to the wall near the exit. His gaze lingered there before swinging back to her and Ethan. “If we’re surrounded by the security team it’s less likely I’ll have to deal with any shit she might try to pull tonight.”
“Can you send her home?” she asked.
Cody’s gaze flickered to Ethan, who answered. “They want to give her enough rope to hang herself with.”
“Which hopefully happens by the end of this tour,” Cody added.
Kara wasn’t sure about the efficacy of that plan. Someone like Alex could do a lot of damage in a few weeks. Then again, if they got what they needed to both fire her and ensure she left Cody alone, maybe a few weeks was a small price to pay.
Ethan nodded. “We’ll grab a drink and hang out. Just find us when you’re ready.”
Cody nodded and the second he stepped away, someone approached him. Kara remained at Ethan’s side, watching Cody give the man his entire attention.
“His life seems both exhilarating and exhausting,” she said. When Ethan didn’t respond, she glanced up to find him watching his cousin with a look of concern. “You’re worried about him?”
Ethan’s gaze lingered then he dropped it to hers. He looked about to brush off her question, but she arched a brow in challenge. “Let’s get a drink and have a seat,” he said, leading her toward the cooler set against the wall. “I’m not worried about him, per se. But I am getting a glimpse into his life I never had before.”
“And you’re not sure if you like it,” she said, following him.
He grabbed a couple bottles of beer from the ice. Then, after popping the tops with the opener hanging from the side, he gestured her toward a couple of chairs.
“It doesn’t matter if I like it or not,” he said, once they were seated. “It’s his life. But I do think a few of us should check in with him a little more often than we do. We’ve gotten so used to his easygoing, yet annoying, tendencies that we might have missed all the stress he’s under.”
At Ethan’s words, her mind traveled to another time. Another person. “He might have wanted you to miss it,” Kara said, softly.
Ethan didn’t reply right away. When she looked at him, he wore an expression she’d never seen on his face before. “Who was he?” he asked.
She blinked. “What?”
“Who was he who hid his stress, his worries, from you?”
Her heart stuttered. “What makes you think there’s someone, let alone a man?”
His gaze held hers, and she was the first to look away. She started picking at the label on her drink as Ethan remained silent. She didn’t want to talk about Lucas. In fact, other than a very brief conversation with her sister many months ago, she hadn’t talked about him with anyone. And even then, Sabina still didn’t know his name.
“It’s all right, Kara, you don’t have to tell me,” Ethan said, brushing his thumb over her palm.
She didn’t owe Ethan anything. She didn’t feel as if she needed to tell him because hedeservedto know—as if there were some sort of cosmic scale or something. And yet she found herself wanting to tell him. Well, that wasn’t exactly right. She didn’t want to talk about Lucas and about how she’d lost the man she once loved. But she wanted Ethan to know that he wasn’t competing with a ghost. She loved Lucas. With all her heart, she loved him. But that was the thing about love: it could grow or shrink depending on how a person fed or starved it. And she’d chosen to feed it. She loved Ethan, too. She knew that now. What she felt for Lucas was no less real or lasting. But he was gone, and her heart had made room for another. Entirely and completely. Andthatwas what she wanted Ethan to know.
“His name was Lucas,” she said, keeping her voice just loud enough for him to hear over the din of conversation in the room. “He was in the army, and we met in the Philippines. We…we fell in love. At first sight, actually,” she added with a faint smile. “During the several months we were together, we were inseparable.” She paused, remembering those weeks and months. The times they’d sneaked away to go for a swim. The times they’d managed to steal a few hours to make love or even just have a meal together. All the times they’d shared a laugh and talked about what it would be like to have a forever. For the first time in a long time, memories of Lucas brought something other than pain. There was joy there, too. It still wasn’t as strong as the heartache, but it was fighting for a place in her memories of him.
“And then?” Ethan’s voice was quiet. As if he knew the ending to the story she hadn’t yet told. As a former navy officer, he probably did.
“And then he was transferred to a base in Africa. I don’t know which one, because he couldn’t tell me. He said it was an easy assignment and that I shouldn’t worry. He told me it would be a walk in the park. That last night, the night before he transferred out, he held me, and we talked about a future.” She paused again, gathering her strength for what she needed to say next.
