Page 25 of A Little Crush
When Tatum finds out, she’s going to have a field day. And so will my parents, considering how I literally told my mom earlier this week that I most definitely am not dating the guy.
Fantastic.
9
JAXON
“Hey, Mom,” I answer the video call and sit on the edge of the couch. “I’ve got bad news.”
She frowns. “No Poppy?”
I shake my head.
“Well, darn.” She tucks her long hair behind her ear, jutting out her bottom lip for good measure. “I miss my grandbaby.”
“She misses you, too.” I check the time on my watch, confirming I have a few more minutes before I need to meet the rest of the guys at the gym. I could always take the day off, but after my encounter with Rory last night at the bachelor party, I could use the distraction. Hell, I’m desperate for it. I still don’t know why I said what I did. Why I even tiptoed around Rory’s sex life in the first place, when it’s none of my business. All I know is, the sooner I get my shit together and get her out of my head, the better. And if it has to start with squeezing in a few more early morning gym sessions, then so be it.
“I thought it was your week to have Pops,” my mom adds.
“Iris wanted to swap a few things around.”
“Well, that stinks.”
I give her a resigned smile. “Yeah, it does.”
“How are you doing with it?” she prods. “The hand-off and everything?”
She’s kind to ask. To show she cares. Even if the topic is less than comfortable. People never really talk about it. What it’s like to share a kid with someone. To be a part-time parent. Getting a full night’s rest is definitely something I appreciate, but otherwise? It’s a bitch. She’s a piece of me. A part of me. Handing her off to Iris every other week is a hard pill to swallow, let alone accept or embrace.
“That bad, huh?” my mom asks.
I clear my throat and shift forward on the couch, slipping my usual mask of indifference into place. I’d almost forgotten we’re on a video chat. “I knew what I was getting into when I filed for divorce.”
“Doesn’t make it easy, though.”
“No.” I pause. “Not easy. Sometimes I wonder…” I scrub the edge of my jaw but can’t force the words out.
“Wonder if you should’ve given her another chance?” she finishes for me.
I nod, well aware I hadn’t even considered it before I saw Rory in the pool a few days ago. Guess I’m a glutton for punishment and figured if I was unavailable, she wouldn’t have piqued my curiosity the way she did.
Or maybe she would’ve, and I’d feel even more like shit. Hell, she’s dating someone, and I’m still fucked up enough to be interested. What’s wrong with me? She’s still a kid. Still the little girl who used to follow me around. But if that’s the case, why is it so fucking hard to merge the two? Because lately? Lately, all I see is the woman from the pool who’s burrowed her way under my skin in a far from healthy way.
“Trust me,” my mom murmurs, “you made the right choice to end things. Iris is an unhappy person. And unhappypeople have no issue dragging down the people around them. I should know, I was one.”
She doesn’t expand. She doesn’t need to. I might not know all the dirty details when it comes to her history, but I do know she was cheating on her husband with my dad before my dad found out she was married. Not that they were ever actually dating, only hooking up here and there. Regardless, as soon as her infidelity came to light, my dad ended things, moved away, and enrolled at LAU. It took her years to clean up her life fully. To grow and become the amazing person she is today. Maybe there’s hope for Iris, too? Honestly, I’m not sure.
“And even though I know this is hard on you,” my mom continues, “it’s really nice to know she isn’t able to drag you down anymore. Not in the big scheme of things.”
She’s right. I know she is. Iris was miserable long before I caught her stepping out. Not in the beginning. But after a few years, I noticed the shift in our relationship, and even now, I can’t help but wonder what triggered it. What infinitesimal event caused the cataclysmic fall out of everything we cared about. Everything we built together. Was it me? My obsession with work? The long days and nights spent on the road? Then again, does it even matter? I’m not sure it does. Not anymore.
“So how's Rory doing?” my mom asks.
The question is out of left field, though I know what she’s trying to do. She’s attempting to change the subject to something…safer. In reality, she just tossed a live grenade onto our conversation, and I really don’t want to deal with it.
A few weeks ago, I opened up about everything that happened when Rory was a kid. How she didn’t want to come home anymore, and how I could really use my mom’s advice because I wanted to make sure Rory felt comfortable for the wedding. Now, I can’t help but picture her naked,which is the last thing I want and the last thing she needs. Especially considering the fact that she has a boyfriend. Actually, fuck that. Even if she was single, I still wouldn’t cross that line, and I doubt she’d even want me to. Whatever happened between us was years ago. Maybe even a decade at this point. And despite how much time has gone by, I’m still not comfortable dating someone so young. Add in being a single father, and she’s my boss’s daughter, and?—
“Oh, come on,” my mom pushes. “ How was your first encounter? There’s a reason you filled me in on everything that happened when she was a kid.”
