Page 85 of Ship of Shadows
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I shoved him. “Why didn’t you explain everything when you saw me?”
His eyes shone with tears. “Because when I saw you, saw the pain I’d caused you, I’d given up, love. I’d realized it was a losing battle. That even if I somehow freed myself and my crew, the shadow king could come after you, hurt you, as a punishment for me breaking free. I realized it was selfish to dream of a life with you, selfish to have ever gotten involved with you in the first place. I needed you to hate me so that you’d leave me alone, and the shadow king would leave you alone in return. If I truly loved you, I had to let you go.”
Tears streamed down my face. “Bastian...” I started, still so many questions, but I’d also gotten a lot of answers. More than I could have hoped for. And it broke my damn heart. I stepped forward and grabbed his hands. “I’m here now. You don’t have to sacrifice yourself for me.”
“Don’t,” he said as I brought his hands up to my lips and kissed his knuckles.
“I’m not going anywhere,” I said.
“That’s what I’m afraid of,” he whispered before he let out a ragged breath. “I don’t want the shadow king to find out about you. To use you against me so I’ll keep doing his bidding. Look what he already took to hurt me. He can do so much more.”
“So can I,” I said. “He’s going to regret striking out against Apolis. I’m going to make him regret it.”
Bastian stroked my cheek with his hand. “My fierce princess.”
I met his gaze, desire curling around me. “My fearsome pirate.”
The world melted away, then, and it was just me and Bastian.
He dipped his head down, a question in his eyes, and I answered, tipping my head up. He brushed his lips against mine. The kiss started out slow, his mouth probing mine open. My hands winding up through his hair. His arms coming around my back and pressing me to him. Kissing him again after so long apart felt like a dream. It felt like coming home.
I moaned into him, and Bastian kissed me harder, nipping at my bottom lip, tongue sweeping across my mouth. This felt so fucking good. It was like taking a breath after being starved of air. His fingers trailed down my back. Heat skittered over me in the wake of his touch.
“I need more,” I said, grabbing fistfuls of his shirt. “So much more.”
The floor underneath us rumbled, and yells erupted outside Bastian’s cabin right as the door banged open. We both sprang apart.
Mia stood there, glowering at us as sun haloed her. We both shielded our eyes for a moment, reality dousing the heat that had flooded between my legs. “If you two are done here, we’re being attacked, in case you’ve forgotten?”
“Oh, blood and water.” I had forgotten. Bastian and that tongue of his made me forget a lot of things.
Now, it all came back to me, and I sent an accusing look Bastian’s way. “I thought you didn’t kidnap boys?”
He looked sheepish. “One, we were desperate. And two, it’s well known that young Cormac hates his father. He wanted to come with us.”
“Well, little Cormac is going to have to work things out with his dad.” I ran out of the cabin and past Mia.
“Where are you going?” Bastian yelled.
“To give back the damn boy you took,” I said over my shoulder. “Just stay in there while I handle it, and then we’re going to continue exactly where we left off.”
Chapter Thirty-Nine
We didn’t get to continue where we’d left off, and quite frankly, the absence of Bastian’s tongue in my mouth was making me murderous.
I leaned against the railing of the ship, watching the blue waters whiz past as we sailed ever closer to Sorrengard, closer to my brothers. It would be a few weeks yet until our arrival, and I couldn’t tell if I wanted to speed this ship up or slow it down.
“Approach slowly,” Driscoll whispered from behind me. “Don’t make any sudden noises or movements. Be gentle and use a soft tone when speaking to her.”
“What is she, a wild animal?”
“I’m telling you, I’ve seen scorned women many a time, and I know how to treat them.”
I held back a snort. Scorned. That about summed it up. After I’d saved Bastian, saved all the Lost Boys, from an attack and returned that boy to his father, Bastian had been all business. That familiar stone mask had slipped over his face, and he once again shut down. I thought we’d progressed past this, that onceBastian had opened up with the full truth, things would be different. But no. He’d spent those last few days hiding out in his damn cabin, avoiding me. Again.
“And I’m her best friend. I know what she needs.”
“You both know I can hear you, right?” I asked, not bothering to turn around.
