Page 70 of Lost and Bound
Arik popped out of his chair. “Fuck, sorry. I’m a shitty nurse. I mean, a good healer, maybe the best—” He flashed me a cocky grin that made me smile. Thank gods, he felt up to being an arrogant bastard. That meant everything really would be okay. “But a shitty nurse. I hate taking care of people.”
He went into the bathroom and I heard the tap running. A second later he leaned over Calder, helped me prop myself on my elbow, and handed me the glass.
It tasted like fucking ambrosia, even though I dribbled it down my chin because of the weird angle and because I slurped it like a thirsty dog.
I fell back down on the pillow, breathing hard, savoring that coolness spreading up and down my esophagus.
“Better?”
“Yeah, thank you,” I managed. Arik might hate taking care of people, but apparently he was willing to make the effort for the ones he cared about. Which seemed to include me. Gods, I was such a lucky man. Despite everything, I couldn’t have been luckier. “Calder hasn’t woken up yet? Did you heal him?”
“No, he hasn’t, and yes, I did.” Arik sat back down with a sigh. “As much as I could. But his own body did most of the work. That and your blood. He’s still catching up, though. I don’t think he’ll wake up for a little bit still. Most of his internal organs had failed.”
He sounded completely matter of fact, like nothing could possibly gross him out or shock him. I wondered how much it cost him to sound like that, talking about his own brother.
I’d seen Calder dying, seen what that foul magic had done to him. But it still shockedme, sending a tremor through me that I hoped Arik didn’t see. If he could keep it together, so could I.
“He didn’t want to take it.” I stroked Calder’s chest, running my fingers through his hair and savoring his warmth. “He didn’t want to hurt me.”
Arik snorted. “Fucking idiot.”
I looked up at him, taking in the wrinkled-nosed disgust on his face—and I laughed. It felt so goddamn good. “Yeah. But he passed out, so he didn’t have any choice.”
“Good,” Arik said firmly. “Sometimes he’s so fucking stubborn.” He looked at me for a long moment, cocking his head, his eyes narrowing. “Are you still planning to break the mate bond? Because he may not realize it, but you’re the best thing that ever happened to him. I’m the last person to try to talk someone into a commitment they don’t want, okay. I mean, I’m…anyway, that’s not me. If you want out of the bond, even if he refuses, I’ll break it whether he wants to or not. I donotcondone unwilling matings,” he said fiercely, his eyes gleaming. “But you’re good for him. Only you can decide if he’s good for you.”
I didn’t ask. Arik would tell me someday, or he wouldn’t. But gods, I was so glad in that moment that he’d found Matt, the kindest and most even-tempered alpha in the world—even if when he did occasionally lose his temper, it was best to run and duck for cover. Arik deserved that. What Calder had told me about Arik’s childhood burned in my chest. I wasn’t exactly the most kid-friendly dude; I mostly avoided them, since they were sticky and knocked things over and you had to remember not to curse in front of them.
On the other hand, I’d grown up in a pack in which no children were neglected, and any one of the adults would’ve died before abandoning any of the pack’s pups. Even my crappy parents wouldn’t have abdicated responsibility for me if they hadn’t had the rest of the pack available to pick up their slack. If they’d been alone in the world, they’d have raised me and cared for me to the best of their limited, selfish ability. I’d have been a latchkey kid who ate a lot of frozen chicken nuggets and probably would’ve gotten the hell out of Dodge the second I turned eighteen, but left to die behind a fucking dumpster? No.
Christ, I was lucky. Despite everything.
“I think you’re the best thing that ever happened to him, actually,” I said. And I meant it, without a shred of jealousy. A mate was one thing. A child was something else. “Your kids are always the most important thing. At least, that’s how it ought to be.”
“I’m not his kid,” Arik said, but his cheeks went a little pink, and the look he shot at Calder, lying there between us, said it all. Arik adored him—idolized him, even.
“Semantics.”
Arik smiled a little. “Yeah, I guess.” His gaze flicked back to me. “Either way, he needs you. So if you can stand to keep the bond and see where it goes—you can count on me.” That ferocity was back in his tone again. Yeah, bobcats might be a lot smaller than wolves, but I’d still back him in a fight over something he cared about. “I’m an asshole. I’ll be an asshole to you all the time either way. But if you care about Calder, and you—if he loves you, then I’ll be an asshole you can always count on. Anyway, we’re pack now regardless. Just, you know. You have my blessing.”
Part of me, the asshole part of my own personality, wanted to rib him a little about his awkward and slightly incoherent declaration of family loyalty.
And about the fact that I was now his stepdad. Shit, I really was.
But that was the Jared who’d had a spleen, right? And besides…there’d be decades to come for me to tease him and get his back up. I could wait and savor his annoyance later. The word ‘stepfather’ would cross my lips for the first time when he had a mouthful of coffee. And it’d be glorious.
“Thank you,” I said instead. “And—ditto. No conditions attached.”
Arik nodded and leaned his head against the chair again, closing his eyes. Apparently he’d tapped out his capacity for heartfelt emotions, and I could live with that just fine.
Decades. I looked back at Calder. I could have many, many decades with my pack. And with my mate by my side.
Except that he’d never indicated he wanted to stay here. Could I leave the Armitage pack with him, leave my family behind? Would he even want me to?
He’d said he loved me. I could hear those words echoing in my head, over and over again. He loved me.
And I loved him. Looking at his harsh, handsome face and the powerful muscles of his shoulders and chest—that strength he’d used to protect me, to care for me—and feeling the swell of relief and possessiveness and joy that he’d survived, I knew I did, down to my bones. We hadn’t known each other that long, only a month and a half. But I’d never felt safer, never felt more perfectly myself, than I had with him. Not even before I’d turned to the Dark Side, also known as Jonathan Hawthorne.
And I craved him. Even exhausted and weakened, part of me wanted to climb on top of him and take his cock deep inside me, until that hollow ache I always felt when I didn’t have him in me stopped hurting.
