Page 56 of Milk & Malice: Vadik
But in the silence, I felt everything.
Chapter 24
Vadik
I stood over her silent form as the machine milked her udders. She broke down without warning. This happened before my eyes—the fracture before the sorrow. Her eyes went from bright and excited to flat. Miserable. I held her and let her be while observing her on the feed, studying every twitch, every blank stare.
When she’d inspected her arm again—when her eyes lingered too long on the hooves—I began searching for medical papers on depression in amputees. I couldn’t assimilate emotions, not in the way ordinary people did, but I needed to understand hers. Not to help her. That wasn’t the goal. I needed to get my pet back. And her brain was the key.
Her eyes were dull, her movements wooden. She hadn’t spoken since the gag came off. Not even a single moo.
I watched the milk trail through the tubes. Watched the gentle tug of the suction on her swollen flesh. She didn’t flinch, didn’t moan—no humiliation, no pride. Just silence.
I studied her.
Considered my options.
I could break her completely. Shatter the remnants of her will. Push her into a deeper abyss—so far gone she wouldn’t think, wouldn’t remember, wouldn’t do anything but lie still and take it. An obedient fuckpuppet, pliant and dumb.
But no.
I frowned.
That wouldn’t do.
I liked when she flinched. When she gasped. When she tried to be brave and failed. I liked the fight in her bones, even if her limbs were gone.
An empty pet wouldn’t beg.
Wouldn’t blush.
Wouldn’t tremble under my hand.
I reached out and grazed my knuckles down her spine. Slow. Measured.
She didn’t react.
Yet.
I’d fix that.
???
I sat at my desk, watching Lena lie in bed. She stared into space or at the milking station. She remained in the barn like nothing had changed—but everything had.
She was breaking, and I didn’t want a broken cow—not yet.
I unlocked my second phone and sent a message to Alexei, my usual pharmaceutical contact—the Bratva’s unofficial supplier. No questions, no paper trail.
Me: Need Risperidone, Duloxetine, and Domperidone. Oxytocin spray if you’ve got it. Overnight delivery. Quietly.
A minute later, he replied.
Alexei: Done. You want benzos?
I thought about it. Briefly.
Me: No. That’s all. When you deliver it, make sure it’s addressed to me.
