Page 63 of Advance and Retreat
Attached to this text com, you’ll find an acceptance contract to be signed within five days of receipt, the name and contact information of your reporting officer/supervisor, and other documents to be completed by the noted dates.Also included for your convenience is a checklist of tasks to be performed prior to the exploratory fleet’s departure from Kalquor.Consult your reporting officer/supervisor if you have any questions or concerns.
Thank you for offering your expertise and willingness to serve the species of this galaxy in this vital mission.We are indebted to you in these perilous times.
Toni heart thudded as she read and re-read the message.It made no mention of her having to shove out kids for the continuation of the Earther or mixed-Kalquorian species.No doubt it was still considered part of an unspoken deal, but the fact that she was the only human who’d applied to work as a negotiator was apparently a bigger concern.Even if she were to go as a mere trainee.
“Well, my curiosity has been answered,” she announced to the empty living room.Clan Imon had flown to Alpha Space Station to purchase some last-minute necessities before they left for Kalquor to join the expedition.
Her gut ached at her impending loneliness, but of course she couldn’t join them.She’d applied merely to see the response she’d get.She hadn’t told her lovers, because she’d seen no point.
Kalquor’s university system had also accepted her as a remote student in their Interspecies Relations and Conflict Resolution field of study.As Feru had guessed, her experience as a teacher and education administrator had extended her some credits toward completion of the training.She’d be certified in less than a year if she took on a full course load.
She’d be a great help to Stacy.To Earth II and all Earthers in general.She should have been excited at the opportunity.A part of her was, but the gnawing sense of missing out on something far more incredible wouldn’t relent.
Toni read the com from the deep space exploration board again.Her gaze fixed on the wordsonce-in-a-lifetime opportunity.How appropriate they were, and not merely for the astonishing expedition they referred to.
Her eyes strayed to the pictures across the room.A couple days ago, she’d added a new one.It wasn’t a portrait.Just a snapshot, caught when Imon, Feru, and Wovir had been laughing over a game in which players were challenged to fill in the blanks of sentences with certain words.The results were often hilariously ribald when they drew wild cards that allowed them to choose their own answers.
As she’d recovered and their worries for her dissipated, there’d been many occasions for laughter.She’d been determined to remember such moments, so she’d taken a picture.As the days and now the hours slipped by, counting off the too-short time she had left to enjoy the clan, the merry photo elicited fewer of her own smiles and more sadness.
Toni grabbed her com and clicked a frequency.Her mother had barely gotten out “Hello,” before she began babbling.
“Mom, I did something stupid, and now I feel like doing something even dumber, but I can’t figure out which choice would be worse.No, I do know which choice is worse, but I can’t stop thinking about it.”
“Calm down, Toni.”Rosa’s tone soothed the worst of the storm immediately.“Take a couple deep breaths.Are you okay?Doing what you’re supposed to, getting plenty of rest?”
They’d spoken a day ago.They’d spoken every day since Toni had woken from her coma.Hearing her mom being a mom made Toni want to simultaneously smile and cry.
“It’s all good on the recovery front,” she reported after taking the breaths her mother had ordered.“I’m at a crossroads in other areas.”
“Second-guessing the interspecies negotiation classes?Honey, you’d be a natural as an arbitrator.I can’t believe I never realized it before you told me you were interested in the field.After all, I’ve seen you adjust your approach on a dime when dealing with parents, teachers, administrators, and kids.”
Toni basked in the warmth of Rosa’s approval for a mere second.Afraid she’d lose her nerve, she plunged into her quandary.“It’s this other thing.I’ve been offered a position while taking classes and training for it.”
“Wonderful!”
“It would mean me leaving Earth.”
“Oh.Must be long distance if it’s bothering you so much.Where would you be?”
“You remember me telling you of the big expedition Kalquor’s sponsoring?”
Silence stretched for several seconds.At last Rosa said, “The trip your new beaus signed on to, the group not coming back.”
“Yeah.It’s a chance to do something truly exceptional.It isn’t about Clan Imon.Okay, so it is, a little.”Toni stood and paced the room as she began to babble again.“I can’t believe how it’s driving me crazy.I mean, I like these guys, and it could be serious if we have time, but we don’t, and we aren’t at the point where I should be thinking of running off into the sunset with them.So why can’t I quit thinking about it?”
“You say you aren’t ready to run off with them, but it sounds as if you are.”Her mother’s voice was sorrowful.
“I can’t be!It’s too soon.”
“Maybe, but the heart wants what it wants.”Another pause.“I think you should go.”
