Page 120 of Enchanted Heir
I nodded. I supposed his obvious absence and the drama surrounding it had probably caused a few whispers in the castle. “Yes, it was. And Krew almost killed him for it. Would have killed him for it.” I paused, taking a shaky breath. “I always thought I wanted revenge, but when it came down to it, I could not trade a life for a life after all.”
Silvia reached out to put a hand on my bare shoulder. “Mercy is not weakness.”
I wasn’t sure if I agreed with her or not, but I appreciated the gesture all the same. “So I’m not sure how I feel about this ball tomorrow, most gorgeous gown I’ve ever seen or not.”
“How can I help?” Flora asked. “What can I do?”
I pulled back from her embrace and reached for her hand. “You’re doing it, Flora. You’re here. And it is as if a piece of Mother is too. I’m sorry I wasted a day of spending more time with you.”
“Nonsense. I was busy with your dress anyway.” Flora patted my cheek. “Let’s get you out of this gown. Then have some lunch brought in, okay?”
I gave her a nod. “Okay.”
* * *
After Silviaand Flora finally left, I spent the rest of the afternoon reading the queen’s journals. I had skipped three journals and was now at the timeframe of the princes being four years of age.
Apparently even at four, they had locked a staff member in the pantry. Hearing her take on how she had been appalled but also impressed with their plotting had me smiling and biting back laughter. The king had been so proud.
It was weird to read these journals and how she referred to the king with affection and respect. I wondered at what point in reading these that it would start happening less and less until it disappeared altogether into the haunted woman that graced the dining room portrait.
Krew came in and spoke with Owen and then I heard the shower turn on. It must have already been time for dinner that night.
I wondered how late he’d been up the night before and when exactly he had slid into bed next to me. Hopefully he wasn’t as tired. I was worried about him, but still also moderately avoiding him. I was beginning to understand how deeply I cared for him, and that grief was about to be a far closer companion than I wanted.
I settled back into the journal, unaware of what to do with all these feelings. I couldn’t fix this. I couldn’t control life or death. All I could do was be blown about by that prick fate, it seemed.
“Jorah.”
I looked up.
“Would you like to go tonight? To dinner?”
I sighed and began shaking my head. “I think I need all the time I can get before facing your father tomorrow.”
He walked closer to lean over and place a kiss on my temple. “Okay, love. See you after?”
I gave him a nod and went right back to the journal.
It was a great one, and I could tell by the worn leather cover that Krew had obviously thought so too. It’d been read numerous times. But reading with my own two eyes how Krew and Keir had been as children was a bright spot in a dark time. I was thankful for it. I was holding onto it with everything I had, hoping to ride it out of this present darkness.
I ate a light dinner with Owen before he left for the night, and then readied for bed. I had gotten up so early this morning that I was already tired again. It’d been a long day, but a better one than the day before. So I’d take it.
I got a fresh glass of water and turned on the lamp by Krew’s massive bed to keep reading. Moderately avoiding him or not, I wasn’t sure I could fall asleep without him next to me.
An hour later, he finally returned.
“Sorry, love,” he said as he took his tailcoat off immediately upon entering the room. “I had some Assemblage business to attend to.”
I said I didn’t want to go, so he’d taken another woman to dinner then? Or sent one home? Anger and jealousy both flared to life in me. As if I had a lack of any emotions right now. “How so?”
He sighed. “I sent Jane home tonight.”
That should make me feel better as we were finally at the final five of Krew’s Assemblage, and yet somehow, it did not. “Am I next?”
He turned to glare at me. “You’ve barely spoken to me in days, and this is what we start off with?”
Maybe now wasn’t the best time to talk about this. I turned my attention back to my journal.
