Page 107 of Enchanted Shadows
“And that’s what weighs on me most.” She took my arm, without me offering it. Was it because she assumed Calix could see us? Or were we getting that comfortable with one another? “Being forced to stay in Agria would not even surprise me at this point. But if something were to happen to you because of what you are to me?” She shook her head.
Wanting to lighten the mood I asked, “And what am I to you, Kessara?”
“My Commander. My husband. My partner in crime.”
I liked the sound of that. “We don’t have fancy lunch plans, but as your partner in crime, I do need to ask a favor.”
“Okay?” she asked as we headed inside.
“I need to spend time with my nephews this afternoon before we leave tomorrow. Warrick’s birthday is also tomorrow. And I’m sure Krew will send word about our departure plans sometime this afternoon, but between all of that, can we grab some lunch, and you can give me a crash course on all things Agria? I want to be prepared.”
She smirked. “I can do that.”
Our lunch plateswere slid to the side. Kessara was sketching, though horribly, the land of Agria. Where the forest ran. Where the castle was. Where the cities were located.
“It will rain. Often,” she told me.
She was schooling me in all things Agria, but I was distracted by the way the light came in through the windows and hit her dark hair.
“You’re going to need some lightweight clothes,” she added. “Or were you planning to wear your official gear the entire time?” Her eyes hit mine and I was struck again by how blue they were. How they matched Krew’s and Keir’s.
“Owen,” she snapped lightly. “What’s going on up there? If anything?”
I leaned back in to look at the map she made and decided to answer honestly. “I’m sometimes still shocked your eyes are blue.”
She smirked. “Well get used to it. You’re stuck with me.”
Was I though? I was stuck with her while she needed to be safe. If I did my job well, like I usually did, then she would be free to live her life. Free of me. So what in the hell was I doing beginning to fall for my wife when I knew she wanted freedom more than anything?
Like a moth to a flame, knowing damn good and well the flames could result in death but wanting to be close to it regardless, I brushed a piece of her hair out of the way. “I was planning to wear my military gear. Remind them of who I am to Wylan. Krew has a crown for me to wear also if you think it would help.”
“I hate wearing my crown, so you’d only wear yours when I wear mine.” She smirked. “I would advise taking some lighter clothes, though. Like you wore for our wedding. Yes, it gets warm here in the summers, but nothing is quite like the humidity of the forest.”
She then wrote down a list of her mother and stepfather’s closest confidants, the advisors to the queen and king of Agria, and a basic idea of where her rooms were compared to where Damek’s were.
Finally, I had to ask, “Are you excited to go home?”
“I—” she inhaled deeply. “No? Also yes? It is familiar to me. Theplace which raised me. I don’t know that I would call ithome, though.”
“So where is home then?”
“I’m not certain that I have one. Isn’t home more of an idea than a place anyway?” She tried to say it lightly, but I could hear the truth and pain laced into those words.
“Do you think Wylan could ever become your home?” I wasn’t sure where all this bravery was stemming from. I supposed the threat of death in Agria? Hard to tell.
She looked me in the eyes. “I hope so. I don’t know. Once you all get to know me, you might ship me back to Agria.”
“Kessara,” I scolded. “The more I know you, the less I want to be without you.”
Instead of laughing me off, she rose to my challenges and bravery with her own. It was just who she was. “And the more I know you... the more I wish I could’ve grown up here. Not because of my father, but because of the rest of you. Maybe our marriage wouldn’t have to be out of necessity.”
I looked into her eyes and she did the same. Time stalled for a moment. Her words were mimicking what I was feeling on the inside. I did not regret marrying Kessara out of necessity, but I was beginning to resent that it wasn’t real. Only a few nights of her sleeping by my side and I found I looked forward to her company every day. Her wit. Her challenging me right back.
But she was a princess in her own right, and I was nothing but her foolish general. I had rushed in to help her, not realizing it would be my own demise in the end. Not because of threats from Agria, because of what it would do to my heart to watch her go and carve out her freedom.
Her eyes dipped to my lips. “When we go to Agria?—”
Her words dropped off because we heard whispers in the hallway.
