Page 19 of It Started with a Sunset
“We mostly just annoyed each other a lot. Do you have any siblings?” She shook her head. “Well, sometimes we annoyed each other for sport because that’s what siblings do.” He smiled just thinking about it. “Other times, it was just because there were five of us and it was kind of inevitable. But no matter how much we annoyed each other, we still loved each other unconditionally. We are much better friends as adults, and I’m very grateful for that. Family is important.”
Her eyes stayed on him for a long moment, studying him. Then she looked down at the spreadsheet, but he got the impression that she wasn’t seeing the words on it at all. He looked down at the spreadsheet too and stayed quiet, not quite knowing what he was supposed to do. After a moment, he felt like maybe she had something she wanted to say but needed a nudge. He tried to think of how to give her that nudge.
“I take it your family wasn’t like that?”
It seemed like a long time before she spoke again. Then she cleared her throat and her voice came out in a hushed quiet. “I was six, and my mom was in a funk, which, for her, meant drinking a lot of wine. I usually just played by myself in my toy room when she was like that, but for whatever reason—probably because I wanted the company—I was playing on the floor next to her in her study. I guess the wine made her feel entirely too truthful, and she told me that being a mother wasn’t her thing. She just wasn’t cut out for it. It was nothing against me and I shouldn’t take it personally—but it just wasn’t for her and she didn’t want to do it.
“But how could I not take that personally? I was her only child. It wasobviouslyabout me. Later, when she was sober, she apologized and said she hadn’t meant to tell me that. But she also said that now that the cat was out of the bag, she was going to stop pretending and start living her life.
“I was pretty sure my dad liked being my dad, but he was also gone all the time for work. I think I put all my needs to be loved on my dad’s shoulders from that moment on, but even at six, I knew full well that he wasn’t capable of being all that I needed. I knew I was largely on my own.”
Brock’s heart was breaking for Summer, and he desperately wanted to reach out and wrap his arms around her.
She cleared her throat. “That’s not a story I share with anyone.Ever. Not even with Valeria. When I was a kid, I always made up elaborate excuses about why my mom had to be somewhere else instead of with me. Or sometimes I just said I didn’t have a mom. I never told anyone that my mom wasn’t there because she just simply didn’t want to be my mom. So, please—”
“I won’t ever share it with anyone,” Brock said. “You have my word. Summer, you need to know that your mom told the truth when she said it wasn’t about you. Some people desperately want to be a mother and never get the chance. And some people don’t want to be mothers but get the chance anyway. It’s not fair, but neither of those situations has anything to do with the child. And I’m here to tell you that your mother not wanting to be a mom had nothing at all to do with you.”
Summer swallowed hard and although she didn’t cry, her eyes reddened and she sniffed. Then she fanned her face with her hand, like she was trying to dry any tears that were thinking about forming, and said, “I’m sorry. I really didn’t mean to bring the mood down.”
Brock reached out and, with a finger, he lifted her chin. “You’re not responsible for making sure everyone is having fun all the time. You’re allowed to feel your feelings.”
He held her chin, and she held his gaze, and they both stood there, an understanding passing between them, a connection forged through vulnerability that hadn’t been there before.
“I’ve got updated numbers on our first Aquamoose Tracks!” Everett had started talking before he was fully in the room, and he froze as soon as he saw them.
Brock quickly dropped his hand and turned toward his coworker.
“I’m sorry. Is this a bad time?”
Summer shook her head and forced a smile. She cut a quick glance at Brock—a silent acknowledgment that she was pushing her feelings away instead of feeling them—and said, “Nope, it’s great. What do you have for us?”
Everett smiled big. “The September event just sold out.”
“Oh, that’s fantastic!” Summer said.
“SinceMoose on the Looseis such a favorite high school hangout, I asked if they would send an email to their list about the event, and they said they were happy to helpandthey offered to put up signs in all five of their cafes. Four hours later, we had filled the last dozen spots. The October, November, and January events got a big boost in numbers, too.”
“That’s really great, man,” Brock said.
Everett clapped Brock on the shoulder. “We might just meet our applicant goal number by December first after all.”
When Everett walked back out of the staging area—probably to share the great news with everyone else in the office—Summer met Brock’s eyes. Then she gave him a small smile and said, “Thank you.”
He smiled and gave a nod of acknowledgment, then, following Summer’s lead, turned back to the schedule and their assessment of things needed, feeling a pull toward Summer that was stronger than he’d ever felt before.
Chapter Nine
Summer
Deja walked from her desk to the doorway of Summer’s office, a paper in her hand. “You don’t usually work so late—I can’t believe I am beating you out of here.”
Summer looked up from the email she was working on and glanced at the other offices—it looked like Brock’s office was the only one with the lights on still. She couldn’t believe it got so late without her even noticing. “It’s been a very full day.” She did an event at a high school in Huron, so she had two and a half hours of driving, she had an ambassador come in for coaching, she had to work on next week’s ambassador schedule, and had to do a few last-minute things for Aquamoose Tracks.
Then she realized that she really needed to send an email to all the ambassadors before their first Aquamoose Tracks since all of them would be present. It was sometimes tricky to manage so many different personalities, make sure they all felt like their voices were heard, and maintain a good group culture.
“I just wanted to confirm”—Deja held up the paper in her hand—“you want me to put in an order for six pairs of moose slippers, right?”
Summer smiled. “Yes. It’s for a relay race—I want to switch things up when I visit high schools.”
