Page 37 of Knot What She Seems
“Let me out!” I pound my fist against the door, tears cascading down my cheeks. “Please let me out.” A sob bursts free from my chest.
How could this have happened to me?
I force myself to run even faster, almost as if I’m trying to escape the memories. But nothing I do can free me from them. I’ll never be fast enough.
I slide down the wall and curl in on myself like an old, brittle scroll.
A part of me hopes the door will be thrown open and I’ll glance up to see the faces of my three lovers.
But I know that’s a futile dream.
Theydidthis to me.
The question is—why? They told me they loved me. Was that a lie? Was everything a lie? Was I not enough for them?
Am I not enough for anyone?
I desperately wish I remembered my earbuds. Maybe if I had music blaring in my ears and reverberating through me, I’d be able to tune out my less-than-savory thoughts.
Faster, Brylee.
Faster!
Tears of frustration prick my eyes as I skirt around a tree. Every step causes the pain in my ankle to increase until I fear it will give out on me entirely. The rain-slicked grass threatens to make me lose my balance. All I can hear is my thumping heart, snapping branches, and crunching leaves.
You can do this! Come on, Bry. Come on!
Everything hurts.
But still, I run.
I run until my knees tremble, and then I’m lurching forward, just barely managing to catch myself on a nearby tree. I desperately work to refill my lungs.
There, in the distance, is Darling Academy, the tall stone towers encircled by the spread wings and heaven-turned faces of angels.
Fortunately for me, I only have classes at Darling today. It’ll give me a chance to rest, relax, and hopefully heal. I need the break from chest-puffing, cock-measuring alphas.
Especially with my nightmares so close to the surface, seeping through during waking hours.
Breathe, Brylee.
Just breathe.
I work to follow my own advice, inhaling deeply and then forcing the air out in a swooshing exhale. I do this a few more times until I’m certain that I’m not going to pass out where I stand.
A twig snaps behind me, jolting me upright.
I peer into the darkened forest, blanketed by early morning fog, only to see nothing but shadows.
You’re being paranoid. All of these mental trips to the past have fucked with your mind.
I squint once more, already knowing I’m not going to see anything. It’s probably a deer or a squirrel or any number of critters that have made this forest their home. I doubt it’ll be a student from Darling Academy—omegas only run when they’re being chased by machete-wielding maniacs or if there’s a promise of alpha cock at the end of the finish line. And it certainly can’t be an alpha from Eros. I can’t see the wall from my current position, but I know it’s there, slicing through the grounds and the forest like jagged, stone teeth.
Stop. Being. Paranoid.
For the one millionth time, I curse my weakness—and the situation that led to it. I didn’t used to always be this way. At one point, I was…happy. Jovial. Full of life. Always going out of my way to make friends and introduce myself.
But that was the old Brylee. I don’t even recognize that girl anymore.
