Page 77 of Lethal Devotion
“Konstantin owns that club. I don’t make a practice of fucking women who work at places involved with mine or Konstantin’s business. It’s messy. Causes problems.”
I bite my lip. “Other than me?”
He chuckles, leaning down to brush his lips against my forehead. “You don’t work there now. And there are no other women, Sienna.” He pulls back slightly, looking down into my eyes. “There haven’t been since I met you.”
“No?” My eyes widen, and he shakes his head.
“I haven’t wanted anyone but you.”
“So what—” The words start to spill out before I can stop them. I want to know what happens now, what this has changed between us, what he wants. But he hushes me, pressing a finger against my lips.
“Let’s just enjoy this, Sienna. This is enough, for tonight.”
I bite my lip, still curious. If he won’t talk about us, then I have other questions, other things that I want to know. “So you don’t like sex like that?” I venture, and see his eyebrows rise again. “Like what I heard?—”
“I like rough sex,” he admits, shifting next to me in bed. “With women who enjoy it. I’d never hurt a woman in bed, not on purpose, and not anything they didn’t want.”
The admission stirs something in me, heat fluttering through my belly. I have no idea what all of that might entail, but part of me wants to find out. I’m curious. “Would you ever fuck me like that?” I whisper, and Damian’s eyes widen.
“No,” he says sharply, abruptly enough to make it clear he’s shutting the entire conversation down, and I feel a flicker of disappointment. His gaze has hardened, but I feel him flinch beside me, see the way his jaw tightens, and I think that he’s not entirely telling me the truth.
I think he wants more from me, still.
He’s just too guilty to admit it.
21
DAMIAN
Iwake in the morning to something that I never imagined would actually happen.
Sienna is curled against my side, still naked, her head pillowed on my chest and her arm slung across it, one leg tangled with mine. My cock is rock hard, wedged against her thigh, throbbing like a second pulse with the need to be inside of her again.
She looks stunningly beautiful like this. The morning light is filtering through the curtains, casting everything in a golden glow that makes her skin look like silk, her freckles dotting her skin like cinnamon floating in honey, over her shoulders and collarbone, and chest. She feels soft and delicate against me, and the memory of last night rushes back, heating my blood as I remember what it felt like to be inside of her.
This feels good, too. Another thing I’ve never done before. Until last night, I’d never known what it was like to have the exquisite pleasure of a woman’s hot, tight pussy wrapped around my bare cock, to have nothing between us but flesh, andfuckif it wasn’t better than I could ever possibly have imagined. Butthis…
For a moment, I just lay there and let myself enjoy the feeling of having her in my arms. Her breathing is deep and even, and everyfew seconds, she makes soft sounds that make my chest tighten, nuzzling against me in her sleep. I want it to fucking last forever.
Nothing ever does.
Last night was beyond anything I imagined. Better than my fantasies, better than anything I could have dreamed up. I wanted her again, as she lay there in my arms, wanted to fuck every story she’s ever heard about me out of her head, wanted to make her come on my fingers and tongue and cock again, but I knew she’d be sore. That I needed to protect her in a different way… from my own desires, last night.
Not the first time, I think grimly. I’ve been protecting her from myself since the moment I married her. And now that I’ve crossed that line, now that I’ve been inside of her, with her begging for it… I don’t know how I’m ever going to go back tonottouching her.
The annulment is off the table now. Has been since the moment I buried myself inside her and felt her tighten around me like a fist. I might have managed it still if we hadn’t really consummated the marriage last night; no one who was in that room and survived is going to live for long. But last night meant that I can no longer wipe the marriage away as if it never happened.
But divorce is still an option. The thought sits in my chest like a stone, cold and heavy. I could still let her go if that's what's best for her. Ishouldlet her go. This world isn’t for her. The violence, the danger, the blood and fear and pain… none of this is where she’s meant to be. It’s not a world for her to raise a child in, for someone so sweet and delicate and gentle, so endlessly optimistic.
I’m afraid my world would break her. ThatI’dbreak her. And I couldn’t live with that.
I’m going to have a hard enough time living with what I’ve done to her already.
Sienna stirs against me, making a soft humming sound as she wakes up. When she opens her eyes and sees me watching her, her face breaks into a smile that rivals the sunlight coming through the curtains.
"Good morning," she murmurs, her voice husky with sleep. Whenshe shifts against me, my entire body hums, my cock throbbing against her thigh. She feels it—I can see the moment when her eyes widen, and her hand drifts down my chest toward my abdomen.
I should grab her wrist. Stop her. I should remind her that last night was the only time.
